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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26592196">Fairytale</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/WillStepOnYouForCash/pseuds/WillStepOnYouForCash'>WillStepOnYouForCash</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Overlord - Maruyama Kugane &amp; Related Fandoms</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Blood and Gore, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Fluff, Mild Language, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Tags May Change</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 02:34:59</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>28,281</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26592196</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/WillStepOnYouForCash/pseuds/WillStepOnYouForCash</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>NPCs really are curious beings when you remove them from the structure of their game. In the New World, Kolmolthan wasn't particularly ill-prepared, but to say she was prepared was probably an overstatement. Much in the same way that none of the other NPCs had ever faced anyone strong enough to beat the impenetrable dungeon, the Great Tomb of Nazarick, Kolmolthan had never served much of a purpose outside of an attractive decoration. However, in the New World, like the other NPCs, given agency, Kolmolthan could work outside of her designed purpose.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Demiurge (Overlord - Maruyama Kugane) &amp; Original Character(s), Demiurge (Overlord - Maruyama Kugane) &amp; Original Female Character(s)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>22</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Prologue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Howdy, I don't know that I'll actually update this much, but uh, I guess we'll see. Anyway, this is the prologue, ya know, the part before the part. Usually outlines the world a little. But you already know this world, so really it's to introduce the character. yay.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>     The stone tiles under her bare body were cold to the touch, but this didn't particularly bother her much when it compared to the shackles on her wrists and ankles. No, the cold was more often the least of her concerns, not that the shackles were really all that bothersome either, but if one absolutely had to compare them, she'd oblige. This was how all of her days were spent, relaxed on the cool stone, comfortably nude, with her ever present shackles occasionally providing a cacophony of scrapes and jingles whenever she shifted to a different position. This wasn't necessarily her preferred way to live, but it was how she was created to live, at least until someone conquered the Great Tomb of Nazarick and she was given as a prize for their show of great strength. However, this day never came, unsurprisingly. So, she relaxed on the floor day-in and day-out. She probably would have continued to live this way, probably for an eternity or at least until the world experienced heat death and all life, including her own monstrous one, ceased to exist. Probably, anyway, but she would never know for sure what the rest of her life would have looked like if the unusual day which broke the cycle never came, but she did often wonder.</p><p>     She snapped upright when she heard an unfamiliar sound. No one had ever made it to the 10th floor before. No one but the Almighty Supreme Beings anyway. She slid to her feet unceremoniously, causing her shackles to jangle, surely alerting anyone in the area to her presence. Sure enough, <em>she </em>rounded the corner. In her long ornate white dress that drug the floor, yet appeared immaculate as always, Albedo, Overseer of the Guardians, stood before her. She stopped abruptly, causing her jet black hair to flair as she did. </p><p>     "So you are here, silly cow," Albedo cooed with a poisonous smile curling across her lips as she did.</p><p>     "It's bull," she snarked back, letting her arms hang loosely to punctuate her disappointment.</p><p>     "It really is bull that they kept such an impetuous fickle thing down here. But I suppose you'll probably be grateful for the upgrade you're about to get, Kolmolthan," she trailed off towards the end before whirling around to bow as a large lich, the large lich really, approached from behind.</p><p>     "My lord!" she chimed as she stood upright, "If you don't mind me asking, what are your plans for Kolmolthan?" </p><p>     Kolmolthan rolled her shoulders back to stand up straighter. Despite, or perhaps because of, her nakedness and the shackles which bound her, she was the picture of power. Her otherwise buzzed white hair was punctuated by short blunt bangs and a long strand which reached her shoulders from each temple. These strands swayed as she took careful and calculated steps towards the two beings before her. Her sharp black eyes were accented by two long black lines on each which started from her bottom lash line to just past her cheek bones. Dark black horns that curved up emerged from just behind her bangs. Despite being naked, she still wore some jewelry including a large gold septum ring, a gold band around her left horn, a gold cuff on each of her long pointed ears, 4cm onyx plugs in each lobe, a gold labret ring, and two gold cuffs around her long black tail, which swished back and forth, the sharp point at the end creating a slight whistling sound as she did. When she stopped in front of the two before her, she shifted her gaze up to stare into the dark sockets of <em>him</em>, Momonga, one of the Almighty Supreme Beings, truly <em>The </em>Almighty Supreme Being. </p><p>     Before Momonga could even begin to speak, Albedo shrieked, "How dare you speak to our master-"</p><p>     "I didn't speak yet,"</p><p>     "-a Supreme Being, this way!" she prepared to continue, taking in a dramatic breath.</p><p>     Momonga cleared his throat before raising a hand, as if to silence Albedo, who continued to quietly stare daggers through Kolmolthan.</p><p>     "Wish III intended for you to be a prize for the first one who managed to defeat the Great Tomb of Nazarick, but since we are in this new world, I believe that you would be better suited for a different position. Does that seem fair to you?" he queried, his voice echoing through the otherwise empty chamber.</p><p>     Kolmolthan scratched under her eye with one of her long, sharp black nails. She gave a sharp huff before slowly turning her gaze to a wall off to the left. She wouldn't lie, some part of her was probably resentful. The Supreme Beings did leave her locked up as a prize to be won. However, despite any intent to be resentful, the idea of serving a Supreme Being instead was alluring. It promised a chance to flex her power, a chance to work alongside her fellow heteromorphic and monstrous beings, and a chance to have freedom. She wasn't just a prize to be won, she was her own entity, who was free to make a decision. Of course, there were consequences to both decisions. If she were to deny her master's request, she would likely be killed. If she were to accept her master's request, that decision was just as final as if she ever went back on it, it would likely still end in her death. However, she still got to make the choice for herself, so she did. </p><p>     "Yes, that does seem fair," she returned before bowing at the hip, "I, Kolmolthan The Bull, am at your command."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>okay, bye :|</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Vexation</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Howdy! This is chapter 1. I know it's labelled as chapter 2, but annoyingly ao3 does not allow for a prologue. irritating right? I like a good prologue. Really sets the tone, but I digress. Anyway, yeah so this is chapter ONE, and it's probably going to be a some relationships being set up, but ya know, maybe that's what you came here for anyway :)</p><p>also let me know if you notice any grammar or spelling errors. I've had a headache the last few days that I've been working on this lol.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>     She rolled her neck languidly slow before popping each knuckle. She let out a sigh of relief as she pulled her shoulders back far enough to create a series of pops. Although she was a monstrous creature of evil, with nary a pulse, she wouldn't lie, there was something oh-so satisfying about slowly popping every joint possible.</p><p>     "You're shameful, strutting around with your average-sized chest just out there for everyone to see," Albedo lectured, her eyes trained just below what would be considered typically appropriate. Not that Kolmolthan particularly minded or anything.</p><p>     Kolmolthan let out a long breath before looking up at the taller succubus, "Well, I spent the first entirety of my life completely naked, it seemed like an affront to my creator to dress now." She paused a moment before shrugging, "I suppose since Wish III is no longer here, it's probably not such a big deal if I change my attire though. If I am allowed to choose a new path for myself, I should also be allowed to choose new attire, or any attire really." She huffed, "I don't have clothes though, or if I do, I don't know where to find them."</p><p>     Albedo shook her head, "I guess I shouldn't be surprised," she sighed before continuing, "I'll see what I can get you, a gift from me, as your Guardian Overseer."</p><p>     "Make it stylish?"</p><p>     "On short notice? I said I'll see what I can get you," Albedo snapped, but a bemused smile split over her lips as she did.</p><p>     "So all the guardians are to meet in the Amphitheater?" she queried as they continued their trek down the long hallway towards the staircase that would lead them down to the sixth floor.</p><p>     "From what Lord Momonga has said, I believe he intends to ask us of our loyalties; of course, my loyalties have always and will always belong to our great Supreme Being, Lord Momonga, but I can't guarantee as much for some of those other slimy guardians," Albedo drew, darkening her tone towards the end as she spoke of some of her colleagues. Before Kolmolthan could respond, Albedo held out her arm to stop the smaller demon beside her. "You stay here, I don't want Lord Momonga seeing anymore of your sinful form, at least not until he's gotten his fill of me first," she chimed, dreamily swaying back and forth before snapping back to reality, "I'll go get something to put on that grotesque body of yours."</p><p>     Kolmolthan laughed and waved off the succubus before planting herself comfortably against the hallway wall. She waited still for awhile, before she seemed to grow bored and exasperated of waiting. She started by tapping her fingers on her thighs. Then, she got up and paced back and forth. Next, she leaned back against the wall, like before. However, she quickly grew restlesss again. Kolmolthan checked her nails passively, checking each tip against her thumb to make sure that it was sufficiently sharp. She looked around, her eyes scanning the walls, floor, and ceiling for anything that she might find interesting enough to draw her attention for any period of time. Eventually, she looked down at herself. She gently tapped the underside of each boob, and watched them jiggle. Then both at the same time.</p><p>      "I think the right one is just ever so slightly bigger," she murmured to no one in particular. She cupped both of them and looked up, as if in thought. "Although, maybe the left one is bigger... I don't know, but one of them is definitely bigger than the oth-"</p><p>     "Why am I not surprised. Of course you're out here being disgustingly lewd," Albedo chimed shaking her head as she returned, white fabric in her arms.</p><p>     Kolmolthan shook her head before looking up at Albedo, still holding her chest in her hands, "Which of my boobs do you think is bigger, the left or the right? At first I thought it might be the right just from looking at them, but the left one feels heavier-"</p><p>     "The right one, <em>obviously</em>, but stop your disgusting show of vulgarity, I brought you a robe, I couldn't find anything else on short notice," she replied, her voice almost sounding a bit tired, or rather it was more likely the result of her irritation with the naked demon.</p><p>     She released her chest before instead reaching for the robe. She slid the robe on, but it was obviously Albedo's, because it was very long, and it dragged the ground and the sleeves over took her hands by just a bit. She tied it around the waist, and then held out her arms and looked up at Albedo, as if waiting for her comment on her new attire. However, Guardian Overseer just looked down at her over her nose before dropping her gaze and shaking her head. She motioned for the, now dressed, demon to follow her to the stairs, which they would quickly descend to the sixth floor. </p><p>      The sixth floor amphitheater was large and open. It provided ample space for intruders of the Great Tomb to fight the floor guardians, for the entertainment of a packed house of golems, with the Supreme Beings in seats of honor. However, now it was merely an empty stone relic to a world that none of the guardians had ever really known. Kolmolthan looked around at the carved stone around her, her tail swishing at the ground, a show of interest or curiosity in her kind. However, soon her eyes landed on a the figure of her favorite vampire.</p><p>     "Shalltear! You're looking magnificent as ever," she exulted, grinning at the shorter guardian as she did, revealing her sharp outer canines.</p><p>     Shalltear gazed up at the new guardian before sighing and giving a sickly sweet smile, "I would say the same for you Kolmolthan, but truthfully I think you've actually improved, but I suppose that's probably not so difficult for someone who spent the majority of their existence in such a compromising position," she drew, looking up at Kolmolthan through her lashes in feigned bashfulness.</p><p>     Kolmolthan rolled her eyes and shrugged her shoulders, "Yeah I guess being locked away will do that to ya." </p><p>     Before Kolmolthan could be left to hit on the other guardians, she and the other guardians approached their master, the one they were honored and proud to serve. He who they owed their existence to in one way or another, the Supreme Being, Lord Momonga. </p><p>     Albedo smiled before beginning, "My lord, we the guardians, pledge our fidelity," she finished, before shifting her gaze to Shalltear, to begin the personal pledges of fidelity.</p><p>     Shalltear held her dress up so it didn't drag as she approached Momonga, "First, second, and third Floor Guardian, Shalltear Bloodfallen, at your command," she stated matter-of-factly as she knelt carefully, crossing her hand over her chest.</p><p>     Cocytus stepped up next, his heavy exoskeleton creaking as he did, "Fifth Floor Guardian Cocytus, at your command," he said as he repeated the same action as Shalltear before him.</p><p>     Aura stepped up next as she said, "Sixth floor’s Guardian Aura Bella Fiora, at your command."</p><p>     Mare came up beside his sister, "Same...same sixth Floor Guardian Mare Bello Fiore, at your command," he stated, quieter than his sister, before they both kneeled before him, crossing their right arm over their chest.</p><p>     Demiurge approached next, "The Seventh Floor Guardian Demiurge, at your command," he drew before repeating the same action as those before him.</p><p>     Kolmolthan seemed to misstep a bit, a result of a split second of unsureness of her new position, as outlined by Lord Momonga, before she stepped forward, "Courtyard Guardian Kolmolthan, The Bull, at your command," she stated firmly before dropping a knee and crossing her right arm over her chest. Unlike Albedo, Kolmolthan had definitely gotten the white robe quite dirty while kneeling.</p><p>     Albedo stepped forward last, "Overseer of the Floor Guardians Albedo, at your command," she finished, kneeling in before her master. "Other than Victim, Guardian of the Eighth Floor, and Gargantua, who faithfully guards the fourth, all of the guardians have gathered as requested, and pledged their undying loyalty," she explained, her eyes closed in reverence as she did. She opened her eyes and looked up at Momonga, "Supreme One, we await your orders. You need but ask it of us, and it shall be done," she further explained, speaking for the whole of the guardians, who completely agreed on that note.</p><p>     "Raise your heads," Momonga commanded, his aura dark, powerful, and beloved by the demons, vampire, and monsters before him, "I am very pleased that all of you have come."</p><p>     "Your thanks are wasted on us," Albedo started, "We have pledged ourselves to you, and live to obey, Lord. I fear that our abilities may not meet your expectations, despite this, we will strive to meet them in honor of the lost Supreme Beings, our blessed creators, this, we vow!" she finished, a triumphant tone in her voice.</p><p>     "This, we vow!" she, and the other guardians affirmed.</p><p>     "Most Excellent, my guardians! I have no doubt that all of you will fulfill your duties without fail!" Momonga exclaimed, raising his arms out over his guardians.</p><p>     The guardians couldn't help but smile. Kolmolthan wouldn't lie, she had never experienced such joy. He really believed in her, in them, in his guardians. Sure, she always had great reverence for her creator, Wish III, who was wise and did well in all his creations, including her, but she couldn't deny the fact that she cherished the fact that it was Lord Momonga who they had the pleasure to devote their lives to.</p><p>     "Now then," the Supreme Being started, immediately getting to business, causing the guardians expressions to fall. He explained that there was no telling what the world outside of Nazarick looked like, but that Sebas, who had been instructed to survey the area, would provide them with his experience.</p><p>     Kolmolthan listened intently, however, she, like the other guardians, had never really left Nazarick. There was no reason to. It wasn't their job, it was their job, aside from Kolmolthan, to guard the tomb. In fact, many of the denizens of Nazarick had never seen outside the of the main building itself. She listened to Momonga as he gave out instructions, Albedo and Demiurge, unsurprisingly, were to take on more of a leadership role when it came to defense and information. They were smarter than the average guardian, and were suited for such positions. The rest were ordered to follow their instruction, which was a relief to Kolmolthan, who was more than happy to not have to do much of her own planning, which she wouldn't necessarily consider her strong suit. Mare was to take the lead in disguising the tomb, which was currently fully exposed in this new world. Then, the Supreme Being shifted to a different topic.</p><p>     "Lastly, there is a question I would have each of you answer," he started.</p><p>     Kolmolthan looked up in surprised. What could he possibly ask them? She didn't really know much. Sure, she was a demon, but her specialties tended to lie more in the, swinging swords she shouldn't be able to at her size, scaring mortals, being hideously evil and wicked, and trying to get into the pants of any being she found attractive, particularly if they happen to be undead or demonic. She worried for a moment that this would be the moment that she somehow managed to reveal that she was not worthy of being one of the Supreme Being's guardians. </p><p>     "First, Shalltear," Momonga started, "In your own words, tell me what kind of person I am to you," he finished.</p><p>     Kolmolthan swallowed a heavy lump she didn't realize had formed in her throat. What a question. Were there words to describe such a figure? She wasn't sure, but thankfully, she found herself more than likely answering second to last, giving her plenty of time to come up with an answer that would honor her lord and not disgrace his name with her unfortunate lack of tact or ability to not say something totally foolish.</p><p>     "Beauty incarnate," Shalltear started, her face flushed, "There is nothing living or undead that could ever compare with your radiant glow," she finished, embarrassingly honest.</p><p>     Next, Momonga called for Cocytus to answer</p><p>     "A man whose strength is unrivaled by any guardian. You are truly worthy of ruling the Great Tomb of Nazarick, always and absolutely," the warrior returned.</p><p>     "Aura,"</p><p>     "Compassionate, and you're always three steps ahead of the game," the dark elf replied.</p><p>     "Mare,"</p><p>     "You're a leader, who's kind as well as merciful," her brother added.</p><p>     "Demiurge,"</p><p>     "A man who makes wise decisions, then acts upon them efficiently and without any form of hesitation. Also, your enigmatic nature makes it nigh impossible to predict you," the devil observed.</p><p>     "Kolmolthan,"</p><p>     She nodded, "Powerful, you rightfully demand our respect, but are also our freedom and strength. It is a great honor to serve you," she finished, trying hard to gauge his reaction to her answer based on his body language, which was as unreadable as ever,</p><p>     "Sebas,"</p><p>     His answer was silent to Kolmolthan, who found her thoughts swirling in her head and overtaking her hearing. Was her answer on par with the others? She wasn't sure. It sounded fine to her. He didn't seem to react negatively, and none of the other guardians seemed to have any major reactions, but she could still feel beads of sweat run down the side of her face. Surely her nerves were evident to literally everyone in the room. Albedo's answer suddenly snapped Kolmolthan out of her head and her thoughts returned to the world around her.</p><p>     "-As well as the man to whom my heart belongs," she finished, her face also flush, and her answer also embarrassingly honest, although Kolmolthan wouldn't fully know that as she was zoned out for much of it.</p><p>     After a brief moment of stuttering, Momonga returned, "I have heard your thoughts and given you your orders. Go work faithfully in my name!" </p><p>     "Lord," all of the guardians responded, before their master disappeared.</p><p>     Kolmolthan couldn't help but let out a sigh as she slowly stood to her feet, trying to brush some of the dust off the white robe Albedo loaned her. </p><p>     "You looked nervous Kolmolthan, were you just overtaken by love for Lord Momonga?" Shalltear chimed, a baleful grin on her face, exposing her impressive fangs.</p><p>     Kolmolthan stuck her forked tongue out at the short vampire before adjusting her septum ring as if on instinct alone. She huffed, "What can I say, guardianship was a surprise to me, it's only natural that I'm a bit off put," she offered, were it not for the cuffs on her ears, the redness on them would be noticed by everyone in the room. She let out another puff of air as she quickly shifted her gaze around the room for literally anything that she could use to shift the attention from her lack of confidence to literally anything else. She flicked her tail in vexation, but before she could halfheartedly try and change the subject, Sebas did so in her stead, however, as he took his leave to attend to Lord Momonga.</p><p>     "Kolmolthan," Mare started hesitantly, drawing the demons attention, "Is the courtyard really a floor?" he queried, seemingly hesitant to ask such a question.</p><p>     The white-haired demon's eyes widen a moment in surprise, before she scratched her chin thoughtfully, or rather in feigned thoughtfulness. </p><p>     "Wow that's a really good question Mare!" Aura exclaimed, quickly rushing to her brother's side. She beamed up at Kolmolthan, her heterochromatic eyes wide with anticipation before she asked, "So, is it?"</p><p>     Kolmolthan grimaced at the sincerity of the dark elf children before her before she gave a sigh of defeat and shrugged, "Sure, why not, there are steps leading up from the courtyard to the first floor, so obviously it's a separate floor from the first floor," she stated, somewhat matter-of-factly before closing her eyes and nodding, as if that somehow assured she was correct. She opened her eyes to be met with the sparkling gazes of the two young guardians before her, only for her attention to be drawn by another voice.</p><p>     "Is something wrong, Shalltear?" Demiurge questioned, drawing all of the guardians' attentions to the vampire, who was curled in a ball.</p><p>     "Are you hurt? Ill?" Cocytus prodded, his voice filled with earnest concern.</p><p>     Shalltear stood to her feet, her face flushed and a mischievous smile on her lips. She looked through her lashes as she said, "No, I'm fantastic. I just got a little over-stimulated is all. His power was intense, my underwear went through a small crisis."</p><p>     All of the guardians made a noise of disgust. It wasn't necessarily that they were all prudes. Certainly not that, but not every situation requires overt sexuality, and this was one of those situations in which being sexual was probably not entirely appreciated by the group, especially considering the fact that Aura and Mare were essentially children, despite their age.</p><p>     "Disgusting bitch!" Albedo shrieked. Although it was highly hypocritical, Albedo tended to have some issues with the promiscuity of the other female floor guardians, and since Kolmolthan was dressed, sort of anyway, her attention could be fully devoted to Shalltear's lack of filter when it came to her sexual attraction to Lord Momonga.</p><p>     "What?" Shalltear questioned as she glared back at the raging succubus. "Don't pretend you aren't thrilled over the gift he just gave us. He shared so much of his power. If something that incredible doesn't make you wet, you must be rancid beneath that skirt!" she shot back.</p><p>     Kolmolthan snorted and gave a bemused laugh. It was a different dynamic to stand alongside the guardians as her equals rather than as a glorified trophy. There was something incredibly pleasing about being able to laugh with beings that were like her. She wasn't certain that she could say, at least at this point, that they were friends, but at the very least there was something that bonded the seven standing in the amphitheater in camaraderie. </p><p>     "You filthy parasite!" Albedo growled, her eyes glowing with conviction.</p><p>     "The Supreme Beings made me what I am, I take pride in it, and a big-mouthed, idiotic gorilla like you won't change that," Shalltear retorted, a wide grin splitting across her face.</p><p>     "Keep flapping those fangs, lamprey, see where it gets you!" Albedo vowed, both seemingly squaring up for what would truly be an incredible fight. </p><p>     Kolmolthan had no interest in getting involved in such a squabble. Sure, Lord Momonga, like many monstrous beings, were perfectly attractive to Kolmolthan, but she didn't get the feeling that she had the correct temperament to be anything more than a humble and loyal guardian to him. Frankly, if Kolmolthan had to guess who she thought would become his wife, she'd probably guess Albedo. Although, Shalltear could obviously put up a fight for such a position.</p><p>     "Right... Aura, Kolmolthan, I'll let you deal with the women issues," Demiurge explained, absolving himself of any responsibility over what was about to happen.</p><p>     Kolmolthan gave an amused scoff, "Yeah, not so much."</p><p>     "Alright, Aura, you deal with them then," Demiruge clarified.</p><p>     "Whoa! Not so fast!" Aura exclaimed, looking up at the taller demonic beings that had all but saddled her with an impossible task. "You can't dump this on me!" she exclaimed.</p><p>     Demiurge held up at hand, as if to ease the dark elf, "If it starts to get bloody, I'll intervene," he offered.</p><p>     Mare hesitantly hurried after Demiurge, Cocytus following close behind, "Goodness," he started, "Is this really something worth fighting over?" he queried.</p><p>     Kolmolthan blew out a puff of air before sitting on the ground, giving up the losing battle of keeping the robe clean, "Tell me about it, I mean, sure, I might be inclined to be fight over someone, but if they're both going to get him eventually anyway, why bother squabbling over who gets to go first," she returned.</p><p>     She laid back in the dirt, letting her arms spread out as she looked up at the ceiling. It was a tall floor with a gorgeous moving ceiling that mimicked the sky. It occurred to her as she laid there that she had never actually seen the outside with her own eyes. She supposed she would get plenty of time to do so once she began her duties in the courtyard, but even seeing the fake sky here from the floor of the amphitheater was truly a work of art. Blue Planet's genius was evident here in such majesty. She didn't realize that the night sky was so bright, that there were so many other lights in the sky. She reached up a hand, as if reaching to try and grab them, but she caught herself and quickly laid her hand back down, giving a single chuckle at how silly it was that she was reaching up to try and touch a fake sky. It was then that her attention was drawn to Aura.</p><p>     "The catfight is over, but now they're arguing," she stated, describing what was a typical occurrence at Nazarick.</p><p>     "We are deciding who the master's head wife will be," Shalltear started.</p><p>     "Obviously, the ruler of Nazarick will have multiple wives. It would be stange for someone of Lord Momonga's position and power not to have a harem. But only one of us can be his official wife," Albedo finished.</p><p>     Kolmolthan sat up and crossed her legs, moving the robe to make sure that the robe covered her lower half, turning her attention to Demiurge as he spoke.</p><p>     "Yes, that's fascinating, but, don't you think we should focus on the task the master set for us?" he questioned the Guardian Overseer.</p><p>     "Yes, of course. Back to work, but Shalltear, we will discuss this later, at length," Albedo assured.</p><p>     Shalltear grinned jovially up at Albedo, "Looking forward to it," she replied.</p><p>     "Now then, it is time to begin planning," Albedo started, "Mare, you should set out to complete the task that Lord Momonga assigned you, I would like the rest of the guardians to return to their respect floors to ensure that everything is in order, I presume that Demiurge will come to all of you at a later date to ensure that defenses are to his liking," she finished.</p><p>     The guardians nodded in agreement, slowly beginning to head their separate ways. </p><p>     "Headed to the courtyard, Kolmolthan?" Demiurge questioned, his almost ever present smirk on his face still, well, ever present.</p><p>     Kolmolthan growled playfully at the arch-devil, "Demiurge, to what do I owe the pleasure of your attention this evening?"</p><p>     He made a noise of amusement, but nothing so forward as the demon beside him, "I'm headed to the lower floors, I want to see each floor and area to assure that it is up to standards suitable for Lord Momonga," he explained.</p><p>     "Ah, yeah that makes sense," she returned scratching the back of her neck as she did. As they walked down the stairs other guardians split off to attend to their own floor. Soon, it was just Demiurge and Kolmolthan who continued from the the third floor, where Shalltear stopped to begin surveying her territories. </p><p>     "Be confident in your abilities," Demiurge stated, unprompted. Although it seemed like sincere advise, his tone read more like prodding for some kind of a response.</p><p>     She wasn't entirely sure how best to respond to that. Finally she settled on something simple and unassuming, "What?"</p><p>     "I'm certain that Lord Momonga would not have put you in a guardian position if he didn't firmly believe that you were right for the position," he explained, pushing up his glasses with one of his gloved hands.</p><p>     "Ah," Kolmolthan responded. She couldn't help but give a small laugh. She didn't even know if she had clothes, and yet she was suited for a guardian position? It was funny, if anything else. "Yes, unsurprisingly, you're right. Lord Momonga in his infinite wisdom made a choice, and obviously I stand by said choice," she replied, a curious glint in her eyes. As they passed through the second floor, Kolmolthan couldn't help but swish her tail back and forth in excitement.</p><p>     Demiurge quirked an eyebrow ever so slightly, "What are you so eager for?" he asked, peering at her with a gaze so icy she swore she felt a chill.</p><p>     "This is going to sound incredibly childish," she started, tugging at one of her onyx plugs our of habit, "I saw the artificial sky on the sixth floor, and I was just kind of excited to see the real deal," she explained, warm embarrassment already creeping to the tips of her ears.</p><p>     "I see, fascinating," he murmured, in thought.</p><p>     Kolmolthan gave a laugh of unease, "I guess, I'm just excited to have some freedom, and some cute clothes," she chimed, swinging the sleeves of her robe as she did.</p><p>     "Yes, I believe that is a sentiment shared by many of the guardians," he agreed as they reached the first floor and headed towards the entrance of the tomb that would lead to the courtyard. However, as they reached the entranced, Demiurge suddenly reached out and covered her eyes with his large gloved hands. </p><p>     Kolmolthan stopped abruptly before sputtering, "Why are you-"</p><p>     "It will be more impactful if you are already outside when you get your first glimpse of the sky," he explained, as if Kolmolthan should have just known this intuitively.</p><p>     She waited a moment, as if she was thinking things over, before she laughed uproariously, "Okay okay, just don't run me in to anything."</p><p>     He leaned down closer to one of her pointed ears and whispered, "I wouldn't dream of it," causing a puff of warm breath to ghost over her skin, drawing heat to the surface, resulting in her face flushing ever so slightly. </p><p>     However, as they stepped outside and she felt the simultaneous warmth of the air outside, and coolness of the grass and earth under her feet, her attention was drawn away from the being beside her and to the new world she was about to be exposed to. When they stopped, she curled her toes, feeling her feet dig into the ground. She reached up and tugged his hands away by his sleeves, and he pulled away and placed his hands behind his back. </p><p>     "Wow," she murmured, her eyes trained up on the sky above her. A million shining orbs reflected in her own eyes, causing them to sparkle as if they themselves were stars. No, there were definitely more than a million. She had no reason to count them all, but it seemed like there were more stars than possible. The moon outshone all of them. It's brilliant white light lit up the night and covered the world in a ghostly glow. She hesitated a moment before taking a step away from Demiurge. She bent her knees and readied herself before launching herself into the air with a powerful jump. She couldn't particularly fly on her own, a tradeoff for other skills, but she could hover for just a bit. Landing on top of the building, she looked around. Grasslands really did stretch as far as the eye could see. It made the crypt seem so out of place, but it also made for the perfect blank canvas for them to mold as they pleased. The sky itself seemed to curve from horizon to horizon, creating a magnificent dome around them. Although the stars seemed infinitely further away, they also seemed just within reach, like she could snatch one out of the sky and keep it for herself. She shook her head at this ridiculous thought and turned her attention to the devil on the ground who gazed up at her with an ever present smirk. As she jumped off the building, his tail flicked once. </p><p>     "How was it?" he queried in honest curiosity as she landed in the exact spot she had jumped from.</p><p>     "See for yourself," she replied, motioning to the sky with one of her long pointed finger nails.</p><p>     Demiurge tilted his head up and regarded the stars for a moment. He wasn't entirely sure that they had the same affect on him as her, but even still, the world around them was certainly filled with magnificence and much to discover. </p><p>     "It is incredible," he sighed, before dropping his gaze back to Kolmolthan. "However, I'm afraid I must depart now, I have work to attend to, as do you," he explained, bidding her farewell.</p><p>     Kolmolthan nodded, returning his farewell and quickly turning her attention to the courtyard that she now acted as the guardian of. There was much to do. So far as she knew, Nazarick was under no time constraint, but it was still best to get their work done posthaste, especially when that work was in service of their master, Lord Momonga.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>okay. bye. :|</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Exploration</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Howdy! Welcome to chapter two, TWO, as in the second chapter. I fear my irritation with the fact that each chapter will be off because ao3 has a vendetta against prologues will only grow. Anyway, I'm excited for this chapter because it will be more freeform and much longer and also the first chapter that takes place over multiple days. Should be fun. However, I can't help but fear that my lack of chapter summaries and unhelpful chapter notes leave my readers unsure of what they're getting into, but fret not, should there be anything graphic such as sex, gore, etc. I will tag it so that you will be aware of what you're getting into.</p><p>On that note, gore/blood. teeth gore. mouth gore. violence. also some language. :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>     "I think sometimes all of you guardians who wear clothes really take for granted clothes that fit well," Kolmolthan commented as she admired herself in a mirror, her mirror.</p><p>     "That's probably true," Aura replied as she touched basically every knick-knack and trinket in the room, in Kolmolthan's room, in Kolmolthan's <em>new </em>room.</p><p>     Lord Ainz believed that his loyal guardians, in exchange for their unwavering fealty, should want for nothing, thus he had saw fit that the guardians have their own spaces. He gave each of them a private bedroom that they can decorate as they see fit, which in Kolmolthan's case included a shoddy straw-filled mattress on the ground and a myriad of weird things on shelves, including: glass from broken windowpanes, human skulls, animal skulls, other various bones from various sources, a dead spider pinned to be in a natural position in a picture frame, a pair of glasses from someone who died in the attack on Carne Village, an eyeball (from what, unknown) preserved in ethanol by Demiurge, and books that she cannot read, among other things. Of course there's also a soft woven rug on the ground, a wardrobe for her clothes, an armoire for a set of armor she rarely wears, and a rack for weapons, including a couple of crops and a whip that aren't weapons so much as they are tools. The room wasn't exactly odd, but it definitely accentuated Kolmolthan's more eclectic and curious personality traits.</p><p>     In a similar way, Kolmolthan couldn't help but feel that her new outfit accentuated her favorite parts of her body. Her form fitting white top that stopped at the top of her neck and just above her floating ribs had a little triangular cutout, revealing the top of her cleavage. Although the top prevented her chest from bouncing when she moved, she was happy to settle for some skin being unnecessarily exposed for, you know, fashion. The sleeves reached her wrists, thoroughly protecting her arms. She and Shalltear were among the only guardians not to wear gloves, but she just preferred to be able to pick at and mess with her nails throughout the day. White thigh high boots with black platforms several inches high covered the ends of her skin tight white shorts that allowed for plenty of flexibility while also covering her legs. It wasn't too flashy, but it was a comfortable outfit. However, like most of the guardians, her clothes would make her standout, and she had to have clothes that would allow her to travel incognito whenever she was sent on missions that required more nuance than simply hack and slash. </p><p>     She tugged at the hair strands on either side of her head as she looked at herself in the mirror. She turned to look at Aura, "Do you think I should get some cuffs to put in my hair? You know, as like a little extra decoration? To tie them in with my aesthetic?" she questioned casually, only to quickly jump and dive to catch a little stone statuette of a cat goddess that Aura accidentally knocked off a shelf as she turned to look at Kolmolthan.</p><p>     "Oh, sorry Kol," Aura apologized, calling the demon by the cutesy nickname she and her brother had got in the habit of calling her, scratching the back of her head as she did. </p><p>     Kolmolthan sat up and laughed dryly a little, "No big deal, it happens." She stood up and returned the curio to its shelf that also displayed the dust from leaves, flowers, and herbs that were drying in front of a high window above the shelf.</p><p>     "Also, I think your hair looks nice the way it is!" she cheerfully answered her questions.</p><p>     "Well, I guess I can't argue with that," she murmured, ruffling the back of her head before checking the points of her horns with the pads of her finger tips while her tail swished back and forth ever so slightly.</p><p>     Then, there was a knock at the door, followed by a voice, "May I come in?"</p><p>     "Sure," she confirmed, watching as the red-suited devil opened her door glancing briefly around her room as she did.</p><p>     "Hello Aura, Kolmolthan. I see you added some feathers to your shelves of biohazards," he murmured the last bit, as if pensive about level of biosafety of her room.</p><p>     "Hi Demiurge! I've been here helping Kol decide if her outfit is cute or not!" Aura exclaimed as she peered at him with one large blue eye through a cracked magnifying glass.</p><p>     "It's a difficult task, certainly not one suited for just one woman," Kolmolthan explain as she sat down on the thin straw filled mattress that provided little to no comfort to the demon.</p><p>     "Surely, I hope the both of you came to a solid conclusion on said matter," he started, treating Kolmolthan's fashion dilemma as serious matter, "especially since I have a request for you Kolmolthan."</p><p>     Kolmolthan sat up straighter, "Oh? What might that be?" she questioned, her interest piqued.</p><p>     "I need some teeth."</p><p>     "From?"</p><p>     "That depends."</p><p>     "On?"</p><p>     "What Lord Ainz will allow, of course, and what you're willing to do."</p><p>     "Ah," Kolmolthan nodded, slowly standing from her bed and attending to the weapons rack. She picked through swords and knives of different sizes. Of course, she could easily claw through bone just with her hands, but where was the fun in that? Everything is more fun with a toy or two or five. </p><p>     "So, you'll do it?" he queried, watching as Kolmolthan threw a knife up a couple of times, catching it by the blade, and testing its weight by bouncing it a few times. </p><p>     She turned slowly to face the devil. She rubbed her thumb over the flat part of the blade and shrugged, "Well you know, I'll have to think long and hard about it, but I'll give you a tentative yes for now," she offered, a sly smile spread across her lips. </p><p>     "Good," he started, "While I'm here, Aura, how is Mare's work on the alert system around Nazarick going?" he finished, sticking to an all-business model today.</p><p>     "Oh yeah! It's going great! He's almost done working out the bugs!" she exclaimed, sitting on a chair with deer horns haphazardly attached to it, swinging her legs as she did. </p><p>     "Wonderful, that's good to hear, I anticipate good work from all of you," he explained before heading towards the door, pausing in the doorway, "Ah, Kolmolthan I'll contact Lord Ainz and let you know what, or hopefully whose, teeth we'll be using," he finished, his typical smile still planted on his lips as he left without another word.</p><p>     Aura grinned as she tossed her legs over one arm of the chair and rested her back against the other arm, "Wow, your first mission as a guardian, are you excited?" she questioned as the demon returned to looking over her weapons, sliding her sharp nails over the flat part of a sword the size of her body.</p><p>     "For sure, it won't be enough to test the full extent of my power, but it'll be nice to get out a little," she murmured as she slid her finger along the serrated edge of a blade-breaking knife. It would be helpful for breaking teeth, but if she needed the full teeth she'd need to either rip them from the root, or dig them out of the gum with something sharp and with a small enough point to get between teeth. Of course, her nails were well suited for this, but it would depend on how cruel she wanted to be today. It goes without saying that she reveled in pain and suffering. She was a demon, by her very nature, drawing screams from the lips of others brought her great satisfaction. Of course, this didn't apply to the residents of Nazarick, and frankly she was less fond of the screams of the innocent. It wasn't justice or any noble reason that the screams of the non-innocent, those who never expect to find themselves in a position where they beg for mercy, were so incredibly sweet to her. Maybe it was the surprise in their voice or the death of their ego that just brought Kolmolthan unimaginable joy. All of this to say, Kolmolthan, The Bull, was as villainous and wicked as one might expect her to be. </p><p>     Aura laughed a little, "You probably won't get to fully exert your power for quite some time. From what I've gathered from the surrounding areas, it's mostly humans and low level monsters in this part of the New World," she explained, reaching up to run her hands along the antlers of the chair. "Although, I guess you'd probably already know that from the number of things you've collected from around Nazarick," she laughed, looking back at the many items displayed in various places in Kolmolthan's room.</p><p>     "Yes, that's probably true, but I feel myself getting antsy just hunting for small game and collecting leaves," she offered, removing the cuff from her horn before inspecting it in her hands.</p><p>     "Well, then this mission will be a great chance for you to get out and have a little fun! Unless Lord Ainz forbids you from attacking humans, in that case it's more small game for you!" she exclaimed, riotous laughing immediately following her comment.</p><p>     Kolmolthan grimaced as she placed the band back on her horn, "Don't remind me, although I will respect our master's orders no matter what they might be, I truly hope that I might be permitted to have a little fun with this one," she explained, assuring the dark elf of her unwavering loyalty to the Supreme Being.</p><p>     "It sounds like Demiurge is hoping for some human samples as well," Aura stated thoughtfully, as if she was trying to determine for what reason he required teeth.</p><p>     "Say, do you think I can take a few extras? I'd like to start a teeth jar for that shelf over there," Kolmolthan mused, motioning to a shelf already containing a generic gray rock and a vial definitely containing blood of some sort.</p><p>     "Who's blood is that?" Aura questioned, her eyebrows knitting together curiously.</p><p>     "Mine."</p><p>     "Isn't that dangerous to keep around?" she asked, a sense of panic in her voice as she did.</p><p>     "Yes. Well, probably yes, but the only people who could possibly have access to it are residents of Nazarick, so if something happens to me because they got ahold of my blood, you know to look for a traitor internally, but honestly I fully believe in the loyalty of every member of Nazarick and their loyalty to the Almighty Lord Ainz," she explained, picking up the vial to emphasize her belief in what she said before setting it back in its place.</p><p>     "Oh, wow, that's actually kind of smart!" Aura exclaimed, immediately giggling at Kolmolthan's immediate reaction to her words.</p><p>     "You wound me," Kolmolthan gasped dramatically, grabbing at her chest like she had been injured. </p><p>     "You've said yourself that if you want a guardian to do any sort of thinking you should look for Albedo, Mare, or Demiurge," Aura laughed, Kolmolthan laughed alongside her.</p><p>     "What's that saying? Speak of the devil and he shall appear?" Demiurge jested as he stood in the doorway of Kolmolthan's room.</p><p>     Aura looked at Demiurge with large sparkling eyes, "Wow! That's incredible Demiurge!" she blurted before motioning back to Kolmolthan, "Kol was just telling me about her vial of her blood!" </p><p>     Before Kolmolthan could say anything to defend her vial of blood, Demiurge held up his hand to stop her, "I'd rather not get too off track, I was able to speak with Lord Ainz," he started.</p><p>     "Oh yay! How's Lord Ainz doing?" Aura asked, excited for an update on their most magnificent master.</p><p>     "It sounds like he and Naberal Gamma are working hard to gain a positive reputation in E-Rantel, but the details are still unclear. Either way, he confirmed that it's fine to take some teeth from humans, but he asked that you avoid trekking too far into E-Rantel, for obvious reasons, but that you might be able to find some roaming adventure parties in the surrounding area and forests," he explained, "He'd really prefer that we avoid drawing too close to the Slane Theocracy borders at this point and would prefer that you stick to Re-Estize Kingdom territory."</p><p>     "Understood, I'll head out immediately," she affirmed, grabbing a handful of smaller knifes from her weapons rack and a shoulder bag, mostly to gather weird things she finds while collecting teeth. "By the way, do you think it'd be alright if I collected some teeth for myself? I want to start a teeth jar," she asked as she debated between donning a cloak or not. </p><p>     "I can't see why that would be a problem," he returned before giving a wave, "I'll leave you to it. I recommend bringing a message scroll with you, if there should be a problem, it's best that you can get in contact with someone." With that, he left.</p><p>     Kolmolthan decided against the cloak, which really had no impact on how the mission went. </p><hr/><p>     The trip to the outskirts of E-Rantel was fine. She didn't encounter a single person, surprisingly, and she found herself comfortably perched in a tree in the forests that lay between E-Rantel and Carne Village. Unfortunately, she hadn't found many people, and none of them that she did find were people she wanted to take teeth from. No, she waited patiently for people who didn't really deserve their teeth. A woman and her baby fleeing their town because it was attacked weren't really her style. Of course, if push comes to shove, all human teeth work just as well as the rest, but really she was looking for something better. So, she waited for something good. Hopefully some adventurers who took a misstep and accidentally arrived in her neck of the woods.</p><p>     As she waited, she picked at the underside of her nails with one of her knives, but she was fully aware of the world around her, despite her seeming indifference to it. Kolmolthan blew out a puff of air as the setting sun marked the end of her first full day away from Nazarick. There was something very comforting about being away from home, but knowing that she had a home to come back to. That she had people that she cared about, and who seemingly cared about her waiting for her to return after she completed her mission. It was soothing to know that were anything to happen to her or any of her fellow residents of Nazarick, their master, the Supreme Being Lord Ainz would return what was done to them tenfold for the disrespect they brought upon his house. The end of her tail flicked lazily back and forth as she reflected on what her life looked like now. That is, until she suddenly grew very still.</p><p>     The sound of bipedal movement through the forest drew her attention entirely. No, the sound of multiple bipedal movements. Silently, she shifted to a position that she felt might provide her better coverage. She listened intently as the footsteps grew closer and closer. Carelessly, the bipedals approaching made no effort to mask their steps and they moved more like rampaging beasts then anything else. Suddenly, voices. </p><p>     "Yeah, you know I really thought that bar wench was hot for me," one man said.</p><p>     "Come on dude, there's no way she was interested, with a rack that large and your short ass, she probably couldn't even see you over her chest," a different man joked.</p><p>     "You two are disgusting," a third one drew.</p><p>     "Come on! It's just a harmless joke, have a little fun," the second one scoffed as they came up next to the tree Kolmolthan was hiding in.</p><p>     Kolmolthan hooked her knees around the branch and flipped back, hanging upside down as she came face to face with the three adventurers, "I like jokes," she chimed in, watching as their faces quickly shifted from jovial and lighthearted to horror.</p><p>     "Woah! What the fuck? Who the fuck are you?" the one she recognized as the owner of the second voice, a man of average height in relatively simple armor snapped, reaching for a short sword at his side.</p><p>     "Someone who likes jokes," Kolmolthan replied, a seemingly innocent smile curling across her lips. Her arms dangled loosely as she remained fixed in her position.</p><p>     A larger man with steely-eyed determination drew back an arrow with what appeared to be bow much nicer than all the other weapons the party possessed. </p><p>     "Wow, that is a good joke," the demon mused, eyeing the arrow with amusement.</p><p>     The man released the arrow, and it complete disintegrated into thin air as it would have come in contact with Kolmolthan.</p><p>     "Your kind really never see the punchline coming with that one," she drew, watching as all three of them reacted in shock.</p><p>     "Magic Arrow!" the man, clearly the owner of the first voice, cried, holding out his hands as little bolts of mana shot from them.</p><p>     Kolmolthan pulled herself back up into the tree, avoiding the attack, before rocketing herself out of the tree and landing behind the three men. Foolishly, none of them wore helmets. She grabbed a handful of the archer's hair and yanked him back, causing him to lose his balance. He screamed and grabbed unsuccessfully at her hand trying to free himself. Saliva dripped from the corners of his mouth as he cried out for mercy as Kolmolthan pulled him up by the hair at his scalp.</p><p>     "Let him go!" the one with the sword cried as he swung haphazardly at her.</p><p>     Kolmolthan grabbed the sword mid-swing with her hand and shattered it, leaving the man to swing a useless hilt as he hit nothing.</p><p>     "I'm sorry, were you expecting the nice demon?" she cooed, running her sharpened nails across the throat of the man she held captive, not yet drawing blood, but instead reveling in the whimpers and cries she drew from him instead.</p><p>     "Magic Arrow!" the spellcaster cried, desperation in his voice.</p><p>     Kolmolthan lifted the man she held by his hair in front of her and the arrows instead struck him, causing him to cry out in pain and groan when she dropped him after he served his purpose as a shield. She heard what sounded like a weak battle cry from behind her, so she readied a knife. Turning to see the man, now without a sword, running at her with a broken tree limb.</p><p>     "How dare you, you wicked fiend!" he screamed, winding up, probably about to activate some combat skill or otherwise just swing pointlessly at her.</p><p>     The demon smacked the adventurer's wrist with the platform of her boot and a deafening series of cracks followed by a pained scream echoed through the forest. With her free hand, she grabbed the his neck and threw him towards his spellcasting party member. She shifted her knife to her other hand and threw it by the blade. It planted hilt-deep in the adventurer's back, the very end of the knife exiting out his chest, sending a spray of blood onto the spellcaster.</p><p>     "Y- You killed him!" the spellcaster screamed, his eyes wide with fear and madness as he wiped with avail at the blood on his face.</p><p>     "You see, I require something from you three, and I think you may actually prefer that I kill you for it," she explained, drawing another knife, identical to the one sticking out of the adventurer's back, and testing the tip of it with the pad of her finger.</p><p>     "N- No!" the spellcaster exclaimed, falling back and uselessly trying to push away.</p><p>     "No?" she queried, a sickening smile splitting across her face as the sclera of her eyes turned pitch black and her pupils glowed bright white.</p><p>     The spellcaster whimpered, clawing at the ground and kicking his legs furiously, "Stay away from me you bitch!" he shrieked, "Take them! I won't say anything! just don't kill me!" he cried, tears pouring down his face in a disgusting show of cowardice.</p><p>     "Sure," Kolmolthan cackled as she put the knife away, before lunging and pouncing on the spellcaster, pinning his hands to the ground with her hands. He screamed as she squeezed until she felt the bones crack underneath her hands. She laughed in amusement and glee, but to the spellcaster it sounded like the embodiment of evil itself as he sputtered and begged incoherently for her to spare him. Suddenly, she released one of his, now broken, wrists before planting her hand hard on his forehead. </p><p>     "What are you doing?" he demanded, his eyes wide with terror as she continued to laugh.</p><p>     "If you survive this ordeal I'll let you go, that was the deal," she taunted, "Or don't you remember, now open your mouth and scream like the disgusting cowardly piglet you are and let me have a look," she commanded, releasing his other wrist in favor of grabbing at his bottom jaw, digging her nails into his skin, causing tendrils of blood to stream down his face.</p><p>     The man clenched his jaw hard, any harder and he would probably shatter his teeth as he let out a muffled scream of pain. He squeezed his eyes shut, but tears still poured. In his mind, he begged the gods for mercy and for deliverance from the demonic entity who tortured him, but no one answered him.</p><p>     Kolmolthan growled, but just as she was about to rip his jaw from his skull in irritation, another arrow disintegrated against her side. She whirled her head around to see the bleeding archer weakly standing up again. She bared her teeth and snarled before sending a puff of hot air from her nose, like a bull about to charge.</p><p>     "Let him go!" he commanded, his voice hoarse from his earlier screams of pain.</p><p>     "Didn't you realize the last time you tried that, that you are sorely outmatched?" she growled, standing to her feet, planting one of her heavy boots on the chest of the spellcaster, to ensure he didn't try and flee. "You're best bet is to get on your fucking knees and beg for a quick death," she hissed clenching her fist and unclenching it, as if showing what it would look like when she ripped the man's esophagus from his throat. </p><p>     "Not a chance," the archer smirked in misplaced confidence, "Ability Boost! Evasion! Focus Battle Aura! Gale Acceleration!" he exclaimed before knocking and firing three arrows in quick succession, each glowing from his martial arts.</p><p>     The demon had no major reaction. She calmly sliced the first two arrows out of the air with her knife and snatched the third with her bare hand, the tip of the arrow less than a centimeter from her face. "It's nice to see adventurers who had potential realize that their potential just wasn't good enough," she remarked casually, as if she was discussing current events with a group of debutantes. She pushed down on tip of the arrow with the pad of her finger, watching as a little bit of blood dripped from it.</p><p>     The archer charged at her, swinging the bow like a blunt weapon. He screamed as he did, "Go back to the depths of Hell where you belong, you unholy beast!" he cried, as if that were enough to force Kolmolthan to leave. </p><p>     Before he could even begin to swing the bow at her as he came in range, she jammed her free hand through his chest. His arms collapsed loosely at his side and the bow fell from his hands as they slackened at his side. His mouth hung open as blood mixed with saliva began to leak from his mouth and two streams of blood dripped from his nose. The archer sputtered a moment, his throat filled with blood causing a miserable gurgling sound to emit from his body. His eyes dropped to gaze at Kolmolthan's arm that plunged into his chest, before his pupils widened as his focus disappeared and the glint of life faded from his eyes. Kolmolthan pulled her hand from his chest, pulling his heart, globs of congealed blood, muscle, and fat, and what appeared to be pieces of lung and shattered bone with it. She looked it over, as if inspecting it, before removing the pieces of bone with contrasting gentleness, while she used her foot not planted on the spellcaster to push the archer's falling body away from her. The spellcaster grunted as her full weight was planted on him. His eyes were still bulging from his head and his mouth was fully agape as he watched as the body of his fellow party member fell lifelessly away from them.</p><p>     "Say, do you think this would look good preserved in a jar?" the demon asked, showing the spellcaster the heart of his party member, blood dripping from her arm onto his chest and neck.</p><p>     His mouth opened and closed like a fish out gasping for water as it dies on the shore. No air seemed to enter or exit his lungs as he stared up in terror unimaginable to the average human and what he had never seen before. The idea that such beings existed, who could commit such cruelty against someone who had done nothing to them, was incomprehensible. </p><p>     Kolmolthan frowned and removed her boot from his chest. She set the bloody heart down on the body that she took it from before slapping the spellcaster's cheek with her blood-covered hand, causing blood to splatter both of their faces, "Come on now, if you want to survive this, you're going to need to breath," she instructed, her voice laced with false care.</p><p>     The spellcaster's eyes focused and unfocused as he looked at her face. Her physical presence was baffling. Her dark eyes and blinding white pupils framed by long, thick white eyelashes and her large gold piercings and gigantic lobes with precious stones in them seemed to give her an air of beauty, wealth, and importance. Her dark horns protruding from her short bright white hair and the stark black lines that trailed down her comparatively paler face gave her the air of something truly otherworldly. It was unreal, unholy. How something could look and act like this, and just exist in the world? He was certain that he didn't know a single person who could rival such a ferocious, merciless, and wicked being. He took in a deep breath, though his chest rattled as it did, she probably broke a rib or two when she stepped on him. He swore that he was screaming, but if he was, he couldn't hear it. All he could hear was his heart hammering in his chest and a roar of what he could only assume were the gates of Hell welcoming him as he passed from this world to the next one.</p><p>     Suddenly, he saw Kolmolthan whirl around and dart off to the side. He turned his head weakly to see her squat and dart out of his field of vision. He knew he needed to move and get out of there. Someone at the adventurers' guild needed to know about the white-haired demon. He shifted his arms and slowly tried to push himself up using his elbows, but his body felt heavy and fluid. Instead, he rolled onto his side, and then to his front, groaning as he rolled over his shattered wrist. He used his arms to push himself onto his knees. Against his better judgement, he turned around, to see what was happening with the demon. He could hear the whispers of what was happening just barely over the sound of his pounding heart.</p><p>     "I'll personally send your fiendish soul to Hell!," a familiar voice asserted.</p><p>     "Oh sure, I'll make sure to really enjoy stealing the life from your eyes, you cockroach," Kolmolthan snarled back as she readied an already blood soaked knife.</p><p>     Recognition rolled over him like a wave. He wasn't sure how his friend with a knife planted in his back wasn't dead yet, but he couldn't question it. Any further threats became only echoes as the spellcaster attempted to pull himself to his feet, only to stumble and collapse into a nearby tree.</p><p>     "That's the thing you demons will never get, we humans just don't stay down," the warrior blurted, blood bubbling from his lips. </p><p>     She burst into a fit of laughter. She placed her knife between in teeth before rushing him. She planted her hands into his shoulders, digging her nails into them like claws, and her feet on his hips. He toppled over, gravity doing all the work for the demon. The hilt of the knife in his back was forced through his back and into his body. He coughed and gasped and a strangled scream left his lips before he could even really comprehend the pain he was in. He took heavy quick breaths and blood flowed more quickly from the wound, and came even quicker as his breathing sped up.</p><p>     "You humans don't have much going for you, but wow, you all really have mastered comedy!" Kolmolthan laughed after removing the knife from her mouth as she stood up. She pushed gently at the part of the knife that stuck out of his chest and reveled in his hisses and coughs of pain. He would be gone soon, of course. Blood was pooling in his throat, and his breathing sounded like bubbling water. She leaned over his body and gave him a sinister smile as she winked. The last thing the brave adventurer would see was her finding such humor in his brutal death at her hands. </p><p>     Then, she slowly approached her last victim: the man holding on to a tree for dear life. He whimpered as she roughly grabbed the hair on the back of his head and yanked him back. She inspected his face with the detailed gaze of a sculptor or artist. Her eyes shifted over every detail, curve, and corner, and then she sighed. She clicked her tongue a few times as he whimpered and gazed at her with eyes wide with terror, before leaning in and whispering in his ear, "Now then, where were we?" </p><p>     "You don't have to do this, please, j- just let me go, I'll never tell anyone, I promise, please," he begged quietly, swallowing a hard lump in his throat as he did.</p><p>     Kolmolthan shook her head, "Sorry funny man, you only get out of this if you earn it," she murmured in his ear, before gently ghosting the tip of her knife over his chest. She pulled him up to his feet by his hair before spinning him around. She grabbed his hair and pulled him forward to his knees, he gasped as he hit the ground, but before he could even hope to recover, she slammed him back against the tree and jammed her knife through his shoulder. He gave a strangled cry of pain and his breath came out in huffs. </p><p>     "Come on, you can't be done already, give me a good scream," Kolmolthan drew, cracking each knuckle on each hand painfully slow. </p><p>     "Please," the man pleaded weakly, his head lulling forward miserably.</p><p>     Kolmolthan lifted his head and pressed it back into to the tree with one sharp nail. His mouth already hung open, which boded well for her, as she didn't need to pry it open this time. "Since you asked so nicely, I'll go ahead and get started so you can get out of here," she explained, as though this were not about to be a torture unlike any torture he had known before. </p><p>     "What-" the man started, only to be cut off by Kolmolthan forcing her hand into his mouth. His scream was muffled by her hand as she reached into the back of his mouth, pushing the nails of her thumb and index fingers into the gum of his first bottom molar, blood already coating the interior of his mouth. Then, she yanked it from his mouth. This time, he gave a good scream, a loud one, like one of his earlier screams. She inspected the tooth, then she left for a moment to retrieve a box from her bag. She put on a show of dropping the tooth into the box right in front of his face.</p><p>     "See why you might wish that you were dead? I promise this will go so much quicker for the other members of your party," she explained. Before he could even try to keep his mouth closed, her hand was already inside of his mouth. This time, she went for his second bottom molar. She dug her nails into his gums again, grabbing ahold of the tooth. This time, she pulled slowly, his miserable screams coming out in chokes as he sobbed. When the tooth was fully out, she again made a show of slowly dropping it in the box. She proceeded to repeat the same process for the third bottom molar, before doing all three bottom molars on the other side, usually pulling the teeth out quickly, occasionally mixing it up and doing one slowly, just to get those sobs from him. Then, she did the same with the top molars, her nails cutting up his gums, and blood gushing from where the teeth once rested causing blood mixed with saliva to pour from his mouth, covering his chin, dripping slowly onto his chest.</p><p>     "You know, I'm actually shocked you're still conscious," she noted, watching as he gazed up at her with pain and anger in his eyes his breaths coming out in heavy gasps as he tried to spit blood at her, only for it to drip onto him instead, "You probably wish you would pass out, huh?" she asked, not really looking for an answer. She couldn't help but find his switch from sniveling cowardice to pure anger at her to be quite interesting. "Anyway, I should get back to my work, I want to be done with this before the night is over," she mused, the hint of a laugh in her voice.</p><p>     This time, she started with his top premolars. She grabbed the first and second premolar on one side, without clawing into his gums, and gave them a test pull, causing the man to wince and close his eyes as soft cries emitted from his chest. Then, she yanked them from his mouth. A little bit of blood splattered onto her arm, but she wasn't particularly concerned about. What was more concerning, was his lack of cry. She shifted his head with the hand she used to keep him in place and let out a sigh when she found that he was definitely unconscious. She tossed the teeth in the box; there was no reason to make a show of it if she wouldn't get any pleasure out of it. She continued pulling the teeth from his mouth, but she did so quickly, a bit sloppily really, because now she was just doing so to finish a mission. After she pulled the final tooth and put it in the box, she pulled the knife from his shoulder. Then, she slit his throat. There was no way she was leaving him alive, definitely not. There would be no survivors today.</p><p>     She cut the teeth from each of the deceased men, picking away any skin or gum that came with them with her nails. She didn't take any time with them, as frankly the moment has passed. She had her fun, and now she was ready to pack up, and head back to the home that waited for her. Once she had all the teeth tucked away nicely in her bag on her back, she looked at the bodies. Kolmolthan hesitated to just leave them out in the open, especially since they were missing all their teeth. She supposed she could burn the bodies, but teeth usually survived a burning, so it would be weird that they were missing. She could always hope that a scavenger of some sort would come and snack on the bodies, but there was no guarantee of that. She huffed as she collected the other knife she used, shaking off the blood as she did. Ultimately, it seemed best to just burn them, and hope that no one bothered to look too closely if they ever came across the bodies. Each body was quickly engulfed in flames. The demon didn't take any time to watch or anything, as there was really no reason to. It's not like the burning bodies of her victims were a particularly interesting sight. So, she turned her backs on them and began her trek back home.</p><hr/><p>     She cleaned the blood from herself before entering the Great Tomb of Nazarick to deliver the teeth. It would be incredibly inappropriate to enter the tomb drenched in the blood of petty humans. She made her way to the seventh floor, the floor that Demiurge was the guardian of, and the location of his residence. The seventh floor was a boiling hellscape. Of course, it doesn't bother Kolmolthan, a demon and fire-immune, but there certainly were guardians and residents of Nazarick who could not withstand the volcanic seventh floor. Vampires, for one, were especially vulnerable to the fiery landscape. The average human would find that even their sweat would instantly evaporate and that their body would boil from the inside out if they ventured too far. However, despite its violent appearance, there was something artistically beautiful about the seventh floor. Something that begged one to wax poetic when they reflected on the boiling lake of lava, the desecrated shrine that became the Blazing Temple, and the way that one false step on a fragile rock could send you tumbling into a red hot lava flow. </p><p>     Although she was immune to fire, she could still feel the heat from the seventh floor in the stairway from the sixth to the seventh as she grew closer to the seventh than sixth. The warmth seemed to curl around her like warm tendrils curling around her every extremity. She flicked her tail back and forth, as if she was trying to shake the heat from it, not that she particularly wanted to. As she stepped into the expanse of the seventh floor, she was greeted by lower-level demons that cackled to themselves as she passed by. Someone unfamiliar with demons might believe that they were laughing at them, but Kolmolthan was aware that more likely they were just expressing amusement at the thought of incredible violence through their chattering laughter. She didn't bother to avoid lava flows, flares, fires, or anything else that might cause harm to someone else, as to her it was more or less just heat grabbing at her feet only to dissipate as soon as she stepped away.</p><p>     In the distance she could see the Blazing Temple, but before she made the trek across the floor, she wanted to verify that Demiurge was there. She glanced around her before snatching a giggling imp by the skin behind its neck, "Hey, do you know if Demiurge is in the Blazing Temple?" she questioned, watching as the imp started to flail its poisonous tail before stopping when it recognized her. </p><p>     The imp tapped its boney cheek with one of its four skeletal fingers before giving its wings a few flaps. "Mm, yes, he is in the Blazing Temple, he's been working on something all day," the imp replied after a second of thought before giggling a little.</p><p>     Kolmolthan nodded and released the demon who fell before quickly flying back into the air and off in another direction. She adjusted her bag that contained the box with the teeth before heading towards the crumbling temple where Demiurge resided when he wasn't out working on other tasks given to him by Lord Ainz.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>okay, bye :|</p><p>except while you're here, I've been thinking about making a playlist for this work. would y'all like that?</p><p>now, okay, bye ;|</p><p>actually, let me know if you'd like more, the same amount, or less gore as well. kinda give me an idea on what people were really looking for with this.</p><p>this time, for real, okay, bye :|</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. ANNOUNCEMENT</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Howdy! Proceed to the announcement please!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>     Hello my fine readers! You may have noticed I haven't posted a new chapter since last year! That's not because of a lack of effort on my part, I have written, abandoned, rewritten, abandoned again, and anguished over this next chapter trying to decide what the best way to get to where I want to go with this.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>     There will be a new chapter <em>eventually </em>this I swear. I rewatched the anime, reread the light novels, and reread the manga. I am getting <em>in touch </em>with the source material and I promise I will put out a new chapter. Hopefully sooner than later, I will be struck with a brilliant idea that will allow me to get back to the things I love: writing about these horrible horrible characters who are near and dear to my heart &lt;3.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>     Anyway, this has been an announcement! Please let me know if you are upset at the fact that you thought you were getting a new chapter, when really all it was was my sorry ass not even apologizing for how long this is taking, while also starting other projects. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>anyway.</p>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Inebriation</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Howdy! Welcome to chapter three. T-H-R-E-E. You're probably aware of my deeply personal problem with the chapter labels by now, unless this is the first chapter note you've read, which in that case, why?</p><p>CW: drunk<br/>TW: none</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>     Outside the Burning Temple Kolmolthan could see the seven Evil Lords that guarded this specific area of the seventh floor when not given direct orders. They are the embodiments of evil thoughts and actions and serve under Demiurge. Their massive and incredible presences typically had an impressive effect on those who encountered them, and each was more than capable of holding their own in combat, possessing the raw ferociousness that a demon of their caliber should. She gave them a slight greeting wave as she ascended the steps of the temple. The seven didn't seem to react much in response to this, but this was likely out of duty to the guardian who commanded them.</p><p>     Inside the temple, the columns that would typically form the structure were broken, crumbled, and cracked. What were once statues of gods and goddesses were now vandalized and smashed pieces that acted as a direct rebuke of their goodness. Finally, the ceiling, that would have given the temple the feeling of an enclosed space, was collapsed and pieces of it were scattered about the ruins. In the center, there was a pristine white throne, completely contrasting the rest of the ruins. However, Demiurge was not seated in it. It seemed likely that he was probably in another area of the temple working. However, rather than search for the devil, Kolmolthan dropped her bag containing the box with teeth before slowly climbing the stairs at the foot of the throne until she reached it. She slowly slid her nails across one of the armrests. It was smooth to the touch and seemed to almost invite her to sit. So, she did. It wasn't as soft as her chair in her bedroom, but it was comfortable in a different way. This chair gave one the sense of great self-importance. For Kolmolthan, it felt surreal to think that one of the guardians could be honored in such a way. She tossed her legs over one of the arms and propped herself up by one of her elbows on the other arm. With her other hand, she picked at her nails with her thumb. </p><p>     She didn't have to wait particularly long before she heard the sound of the decisive steps of Demiurge. However, she remained seated in his throne, as if to test the limits of his patience. </p><p>     "Your creator must have really loved you to set you up with such a place of honor," she opined as her gaze remained trained on her nails before she slowly shifted it to the man who stood at the foot of his own throne.</p><p>     "Yes, this dominion is the greatest reflection of Master Ulbert's love," he drew, eying her carefully, his arms crossed over his chest. Something about seeing her draped lazily on his own throne was exciting, it was like an unexpected challenge or puzzle that demanded to be solved.</p><p>     She closed her eyes and took in a long breath as her lips curved down into a slight frown, "I owe basically everything I have to Lord Ainz," she murmured, a bitter note in her tone, as she slowly opened her eyes and looked beyond the devil and instead gazed over the domain that was given to him by his own creator.</p><p>     "That is true," he started, a bit of curiosity in his voice as he considered what the demon before him was getting at, "but are you so brazen as to speak ill of your own creator?" he queried.</p><p>     Kolmolthan's lips curved up slightly as she focused her attention back on the devil whose throne she had taken for herself, "I can't claim to understand Master Wish III's wisdom when he tucked me away and wasted my potential from the beginning of my existence, and though I could never bring myself to hate my creator, I have to wonder if he didn't love me like the other Supreme Beings loved their creations," she stated flatly as she slid her fingers down the back of the chair in admiration of the detail put into the pièce de résistance of the crumbled temple.</p><p>     "I'm certain Master Wish loved you."</p><p>     Her tail flicked in irritation. Oh how she wanted to snap back that there's no way he did. How could he say that Wish III loved her as much as Ulbert loved him? Or as much as Bukubukuchagama loved Aura? Ridiculous. Sure, she can't deny that Wish III must have loved her in someway, after all he gave her life and made her strong and proud, but still, he also specifically made her to be sent away. If he loved her, wouldn't he want to keep her? Plus, the other Supreme Beings left them behind. Sure, it was probably for a good reason, one that she as a mere guardian couldn't even hope to understand, but still, it was hard to reckon with. It was impossible for her to hate him, and really all she wanted was confirmation that her creator had loved her, but it seemed unlikely to her that she would ever know for sure.</p><p>     "Lord Ainz has given me everything Wish III never did. It may be sacrilegious, but I'd even say that Lord Ainz was the one who gave me life," Kolmolthan stated calmly as she rose to her feet. "I offer my gratitude to Wish III for introducing me to this world, but it is Lord Ainz who I would choose to serve if forced to choose," she finished, though she seemed content to look at literally anything other than the other guardian in the room.</p><p>     "Sacrilegious or not, I believe all of the guardians would echo that sentiment, Lord Ainz is truly the Supreme Being of the Supreme Beings," he mused, as he climbed the stairs halfway and held out his hand to guide her down the stairs. </p><p>     Although she was reluctant, she acquiesced and placed her hand in his gloved one as she descended the stairs, swapping places with the person who actually had the right to sit atop the throne. She picked up her bag while he took a seat on his throne and crossed one leg over the other casually.</p><p>     "Anyway, I got you the teeth you asked for, 92, from three different male adventurers. One was missing a tooth and another was missing three," she explained, removing the box and holding it up for him to see. </p><p>     "Did you want to keep some for yourself?" he asked as he peered at the box with interest, remembering her desire to start a jar of a teeth.</p><p>     She shook her head, "If you have any left over I'd be more than happy to take them off your hands, but I wanted to get back home so I didn't try and get any extras for myself," she explained.</p><p>     "I'm certain I'll have some for you," he returned, considering his plans for them.</p><p>     "Speaking of, what do you need them for? If you don't mind me asking," she questioned, shifting her weight slightly to her right leg, her tail lazily swinging back and forth a few times.</p><p>     "I see your curiosity remains as insatiable as ever," he mused, a slight grin spreading over his lips revealing his sharp canines, "Some of them are going to be components for a variety of experiments I have planned at Lord Ainz's request, and some of them will also be used in a personal project of my own," he explained.</p><p>     "Personal project? Like?"</p><p>     Demiurge let out a slightly breathy laugh of amusement before lifting his hands and shrugging, "I'm not entirely sure yet, my work for Lord Ainz is more often than not my muse, so I'll likely find inspiration in the coming days," he elaborated, though not much came of it for Kolmolthan.</p><p>     She seemed to accept that explanation without feeling the need to pry further, "I have to imagine that Lord Ainz must be pleased to know that his orders are so inspiring," she replied, a slight laugh in her voice. Then, she held out the box, offering it to Demiurge. He rose from his throne and retrieved the box, lifting the lid a bit to get a brief glance at the teeth. Sure enough, in the small box were many bloody teeth that he was certain Kolmolthan took the utmost pleasure in removing from their previous owners. He closed the box with a sharp snap before returning to his rightful place on his throne. </p><p>     "You have my sincerest gratitude Kolmolthan, should you ever need my skillset for anything, please do not hesitate to ask," Demiurge remarked earnestly, more than willing to return the favor.</p><p>     Her lips curved up into a mischievous smile, "You should be careful giving others such generous offers," she shared, the glint in her eyes practically taunting him to revoke his offer.</p><p>     "You might be right, but I'm confident that neither you nor any other resident of Nazarick would abuse my genuine kindness," he mused, tapping his fingers in his knee as he seemed to be thinking over the validity his words as he said them.</p><p>     Kolmolthan flicked her forked tongue at him, "Boo, it's a lot less fun when you beat me with high intelligence and logic, you devil," she sighed, feigning disappointment.</p><p>     "I'm sure," he started, his lips pulling into his own mischievous smirk, "It must be hard to lose to someone who probably couldn't beat you in an arm wrestle," he taunted, taking great enjoyment of the irritation of the demon.</p><p>     "I could snap you like a twig."</p><p>     "Undoubtedly, though you wouldn't," he challenged, watching as she crossed her arms in further defeat.</p><p>     "You sure are making me question that stance," she muttered.</p><p>     "I doubt that," he returned, briefly shifting his attention to adjusting his gloves before returning his gaze back to the ever so slightly irritated demon.</p><p>     Kolmolthan snorted, "Bold assumption."</p><p>     "I don't think it's an assumption when it's beyond a reasonable doubt," he replied, watching her shift her weight to her other leg as she searched for a clever response. Of course, he would give her no such victory as he held up his hand to stop her, "Not to change the subject, but I actually have some questions concerning the security of the courtyard."</p><p>     "Oh?"</p><p>     "Yes, it's mostly occupied by low-level undead, correct?"</p><p>     She gave a slight nod, "Yup, mindless little skeleton friends, not great for conversation, but it's better than being all alone out there. The worst thing is they keep accidentally destroying my flowers."</p><p>     He paused a moment and narrowed his eyes at her, "You planted flowers?"</p><p>     "Well, not me, but Lord Ainz asked that I request something to make the courtyard feel more comfortable, so I asked that the groundkeepers be allowed to introduce some more biodiversity."</p><p>     "So... flowers?"</p><p>     She gave a slightly mischievous laugh, "All poisonous to humans of course."</p><p>     "Of course."</p><p>     "But, unfortunately, the skeletons are not so capable of not dragging their boney little bodies through the flower beds, meaning the groundskeepers have to keep replanting them. I'd help, but they don't seem to particularly need it. Anyway, I just figured they might be helpful to Nazarick, and at the very least, they're nice to look at, especially since they're a gift from Lord Ainz."</p><p>     "I see," he murmured, in thought for a moment before returning to the previous topic of conversation, "Yes well, aside from yourself, are there any commanders in the courtyard?"</p><p>     She scoffed, "Nope, it's just me and the shambling."</p><p>     He rested his chin on his folded hands in thought, a slight frown pulling over his lips, "This seems like a very obvious security issue, surely you had to be aware of this?" he queried, watching her closely.</p><p>     Kolmolthan jumped slightly, "I- well I didn't see it as a major problem, I mean from what I've seen there's nothing in this world that actually poses a serious threat to us, I figured if something somehow managed to pass Mare's detection system without being discovered I'd be more than capable of taking care of it."</p><p>     He sighed and pinched the bridge of nose before shaking his head, "Shalltear's rebellion demonstrates that that is not necessarily the case," he explained, watching as her eyes widened in realization.</p><p>     She nodded quickly, "Ah! You're right!" she exclaimed</p><p>     "Yes well, for both your safety and the safety of Nazarick this must be rectified immediately."</p><p>     "Of course, just a couple of mid-level undead should be more than enough to provide a little bit of guidance to the undead already in the courtyard," she explained, considering carefully the impact of a couple of commanders.</p><p>     He nodded, making a mental note of her assessment, "Noted, I'll do my own survey as well, but for the time being I'll tentatively agree with you. Another question, when you're away from Nazarick, who guards the courtyard?"</p><p>     "The members of the Pleiades, I believe."</p><p>     He seemed to accept this answer without any sort of argument. "Should the Pleiades be unavailable, could you potentially leave a summon behind; Minathaurus perhaps?"</p><p>     Kolmolthan gave a hesitant shrug as she thought about the cow-headed demon she could summon, "I could, though summoning Minathaurus, as cute as they are, would leave me unable to summon anyone else for 72 hours, but in a pinch, I definitely could."</p><p>     "What about Callithea and her children?"</p><p>     "Summoning Callithea would only set me back 48 hours. It usually takes her around two hours to call her children to her, but their power combined is comparable to Minathaurus's," she recounted, considering the demon that sported horns where eyes would typically be on a humanoid.</p><p>     "I'll keep that in mind, by the way, all guardians are being assigned a shadow demon, including yourself."</p><p>     Kolmolthan clapped her hands together, her eyes sparkling with excitement. She had mentioned a couple of times that she'd like a shadow demon to be able to communicate with the tomb while attending her duties in the courtyard, but she hadn't made the request to Lord Ainz yet, fearing it would be selfish or disrespectful of her to request a shadow demon while they were still dealing with the fallout from Shalltear's rebellion and figuring out how to gather information more effectively.</p><p>     "Second order of business, do you know if Albedo has checked on Shalltear recently?" Demiurge queried, figuring he might as well check off a couple of more things on his to-do list while Kolmolthan was there.</p><p>     She tapped her chin with one of her sharp nails before ultimately shrugging, "I'm not sure."</p><p>     He gave a hum of understanding, "Ah, then someone should probably check on her, last time I was at the bar with Cocytus, Sous-chef mentioned that Shalltear had been spending quite a bit of time there in far too frequent benders."</p><p>    She quirked an eyebrow skeptically before questioning, "If you know where she is, why don't you just go check on her?"</p><p>    His signature smile returned to his features as he answered, "I figured I leave that to the women."</p><p>    "Sexist!"</p><p>    He scoffed and held up a hand, "Please, I figured I'd leave it to the women because she prefers the company of women to men."</p><p>    "Oh, right, that's true, she's told me more than once the only good man is a dead one, I'm sure that doesn't apply to her fellow guardians though," she offered, a bead of sweat forming on her temple as she recalled those conversations.</p><p>     Demiurge chuckled slightly, "Agreed, even still, I figured Albedo, Aura, or you might have better luck."</p><p>     "I'll see if Albedo has some free time and her and I will slap some sense into Shalltear," she explained, clapping her hands together too punctuate her sentence.</p><p>     "Fantastic, if you have no questions, I must attend to my work."</p><p>     Kolmolthan shook her head once, "Nope, no questions here, if you need anything else, let me know, otherwise I'm going to get back to work too," she returned.</p><p>     He watched as she turned around, shifting her bag on her shoulder as she left the Burning Temple and headed back across the seventh floor to make her way to wherever she was needed at this time. He watched her as she walked away. Not for any perverse reason or anything. He just did. For a moment, he couldn't help but fantasize what it would be like if she turned around and asked him if he would teleport her to the surface so she wouldn't have to walk all the way there. She'd hold onto his arm or he'd wrap an arm around her, and when they'd arrive, she'd give him one of those clever little smiles of hers and disappear into the courtyard to get to work while he'd watch her go. Of course, he quickly perished these thoughts and sighed at how completely ridiculous they were. It was one thing to simply lust for a resident of Nazarick, but to desire such domesticity, with another guardian no less? Surely that would be an incredible waste of his energy. When there was so much work to be done around the tomb, how could he possibly ask for more? After everything Lord Ainz had done for him, what made him think he had the right to ask for time to spend following her around like some helpless pup. With that thought, he rose from his seat, the box of teeth firmly in his grasp as he elected to abandon his daydreams and head to work.</p><hr/><p>      Albedo and Kolmolthan peeked their heads into the bar, immediately spotting the drunken Shalltear, requesting another drink, which in her case was a bottle. It takes a lot to get the undead drunk after all. They quickly returned to the hallway and looked at one another, hoping the other had an idea for how to approach the morose Shalltear. Albedo motioned Kolmolthan to go first, only to huff quietly as she responded by crossing her arms in front of her to form an 'x'. </p><p>     "Come on," she whisper-yelled, "Someone has to go check on her, since you, not traditionally attractive, clearly aren't in the competition to become Lord Ainz's main wife, you'll pose less of a threat," she explained, a false smile on her lips.</p><p>     Kolmolthan rolled her eyes in response, "First of all, hurtful, but fair, second of all, everyone knows my money is on you becoming Lord Ainz's wife! By your logic, I'd be just as threatening!" she returned, her voice hushed as they avoided drawing the attention of the drunk vampire at the bar.</p><p>     Albedo scoffed, "Well, I didn't know you wanted me to be Lord Ainz's wife! But also, wouldn't we make the cutest children? I mean, my womb, his everything, it'd be magnificent," she swooned dreamily, imagining her, Lord Ainz, and their child having a picnic under a shady tree somewhere lovely and beautiful, the perfect spot for the most Supreme Being and his family.</p><p>     The demon rolled her eyes, again, but nodded, "Yes yes, I look forward to serving the three of you for many eternities. It will be the most magnificent existence for all of us, but seriously keep it in your pants! We need to stay focused on the problem at hand!" she huffed, motioning to she who was the problem at hand.</p><p>     The dark-haired woman closed her eyes, ending her bliss prematurely before putting a firm and determined expression on her soft features, "Yes, of course, there will be plenty of time for me to consider how the rest of you background characters can ensure that I bare Lord Ainz's children-"</p><p>     "Background characters?"</p><p>     "But right now we need to get Shalltear back into shape," she finished, ignoring the confusion of the shorter demon before her.</p><p>     She gave a reluctant nod, "Exactly," she started, shifting her gaze to the downtrodden Shalltear before returning her gaze to Albedo, "So, obviously, you should go in first."</p><p>     Before Albedo could protest, they heard the slurred voice of said vampire, "Oh my god, will you two just shut up and come in already?" she yelled, irritation and sadness laced in her tone.</p><p>     Both Albedo and Kolmolthan made a noise of surprise before they both slowly turned to see the vampire swaying side to side on her stool as she tipped the bottle back, downing the last of the bottle's contents before attempting to toss it back on the bar, shattering it in the process, to the dismay of Sous-chef. Kolmolthan moved first, filled with determination, she marched into the bar and sat on the stool next to Shalltear. Albedo did the same shortly after, sitting on the other side of her, though she took a moment to complain about the fact that some of the alcohol Shalltear spilled would ruin her dress.</p><p>     "So, Shalltear, what are we drinking tonight?" Kolmolthan asked, waving Sous-chef over as she did.</p><p>     Shalltear giggled jovially as her head lulled to the side before turning her gaze to look at Kolmolthan, "Well, I started with gin, and then I drank a bunch of wine, like, so much wine, and now I just finished vodka, I'm thinking about beer next, slow down a little ya know?"</p><p>     "For sure, Sous-chef," she called, "Three of whatever's on tap!" she finished, a wide grin on her face as she turned her attention back to the women she sat with.</p><p>     Albedo scoffed, "Seriously? How uncouth! What if Lord Ainz were to call my to his bed tonight and I were to show up under the influence of alcohol! Plus, didn't you say we were supposed to help Shalltear?"</p><p>     As the drinks were sat in front of them by the bartender, Kolmolthan shrugged, "If Lord Ainz calls you to his bed tonight, I'll sober you up with a cold shower and some coffee. And Demiurge said he would leave it up to us to check on Shalltear, and I'm not the counseling type, so if Shalltear wants to drink, we're going to drink!"</p><p>     She grabbed her mug and held it towards the other for for a toast. Shalltear immediately grabbed hers and joined the toast, followed by a hesitant Albedo. Kolmolthan gave a slight laugh of mirth before she and Shalltear drained their mugs.</p><p>     "Come on Albedo," Kolmolthan cooed, eyeing the succubus playfully until she finally tipped her own drink back, putting it back on the bar a little too hard when she did, causing her to silently apologize to Sous-chef, who now had three unruly women to serve instead of just one.</p><p>     "Say, what are we toasting anyway Kol?" Shalltear queried, motioning for another round.</p><p>     "I dunno, what do you want to toast?"</p><p>     The vampire's eyes fell to the bar as she blindly reached for her refilled mug, "Well, what even is there to toast anyway?" she asked bitterly.</p><p>     "You tell me kid."</p><p>     "Kid? I'm older than you!" she shot back at the grinning demon.</p><p>     "Sure, but I've got bigger tits."</p><p>     Albedo snorted, drawing the attention of both of the women, shocked by Albedo's display, "If that's how we determine who's younger, I must be the oldest guardian!" she giggled, her cheeks already flushed, even though she had had exactly one and a half drinks.</p><p>     Shalltear and Kolmolthan both responded with a chorus of giggles before toasting to big tits and finishing their drinks. </p><p>     "I dunno," Kolmolthan started, gazing at Albedo through her lashes as she waited for Sous-chef to finish filling her mug, "Cocytus might have you beat there."</p><p>     "You moron! Those aren't tits, it's his exoskeleton!" Shalltear shot back, still swaying despite sitting still.</p><p>     Albedo snorted again, spitting the beer she had been drinking out onto the bar, causing both of the other guardians to bust into fits of laughter at their typically prim and proper overseer growing increasingly sloppy.</p><p>     When Kolmolthan collected herself she leaned onto the bar to catch Sous-chef's attention, despite the fact that they definitely already had Sous-chef's attention, "Sous-chef! Please, we need some shots over here!"</p><p>     "Shots of?" he questioned, exasperation more than evident in his voice.</p><p>     Kolmolthan's mind immediately went blank on literally every single type of alcohol at that exact moment. "Uh," she started, floundering until she finally managed to put a couple of thoughts together, "Whiskey!"</p><p>     "Geesh, do you want to put me out of commission entirely?" Albedo drew, the effects of three beers clearly already evident in how her eyelids sank and her words strung together.</p><p>     She gave a small laugh, but didn't exactly answer. After all, maybe she was? Maybe she wanted to see what her friends looked like when they really let loose. Thankfully, it wasn't going to be too hard since Shalltear was already wasted, and it was well known that Albedo had zero tolerance. The tough part was going to be getting caught up. So, before Shalltear could grab her shot, Kolmolthan snatched both and threw them back, her face scrunching up slightly, especially since she hadn't had the foresight to order something to chase with. Maybe she was feeling it more than she thought she was. </p><p>     "Two more for me, one for Shalltear," she ordered, sending a half of an apology to Shalltear with a sneaky grin. When Sous-chef placed the drinks in front of the women, Kolmolthan carefully held up both of hers for another toast, "To tits, on men, women, everyone in between, and everyone beyond," she said, a stupid grin still plastered on her face.</p><p>     The other two women laughed, more than willing to toast to that. They downed their shots, all three finding themselves without something to chase with. Kolmolthan laughed when she was finally able to un-scrunch her face, and it wasn't long before the other two joined her in laughing. At what? Frankly, just the fact that this is where they were. They were three immensely powerful beings, but what else could they do but imbibe copious amounts of alcohol for no reason other than to just do so. </p><p>     "So, Kolmolthan, since you're an imparshish- parishial- impartial! I got it! I got it!" Albedo slurred, giggling as she stumbled over her words, "Koko-"</p><p>     "Koko?" Kolmolthan snorted, giggling at the nickname Albedo gave her impromptu.</p><p>     "Shut up! I'm trying to ask you a question!" she cried with incredible honesty, "I have a question, and as your guardian overseer, I demand you listen to it and then answer it!" she ordered, trying to sound official, but really, she was just being loud.</p><p>     Kolmolthan giggled again, holding onto the bar to stabilize herself before she took another shot, this time chasing it with one of those pretty layer drinks Sous-chef specialized in, "Okay okay," she returned as she messily wiped her mouth with her sleeve.</p><p>     "Okay, Koko, since you're impartial judge, who do you think will marry Lord Ainz?"</p><p>     "Oh definitely Gargantua."</p><p>     Both of the other women shrieked in surprised at her answer, causing her to continue her fit of uncontrollable laughter. The other two looked at each other before also falling into similar fits of laughter. Albedo held onto Shalltear, who held onto Kolmolthan, who held onto the bar for dear life, fairly certain that if she let go they'd all go tumbling onto the floor. </p><p>     "Hey! We need some music!" Kolmolthan suddenly exclaimed.</p><p>     "Music?" Shalltear queried, nearly tipping completely over as she tried to sit up straight.</p><p>     "Yeah! I want to dance! We should all dance, but we need music!" Kolmolthan explained, rather seriously.</p><p>     Sous-chef huffed, "Unfortunately, or rather more likely fortunately, the bar is a place for people to drink <em>quietly, </em>so if you'd like to do that, I recommend you find someplace else."</p><p>     Shalltear rested her head on her folded arms, "First I dishonored my beloved Lord Ainz, and now we can't even dance," she cried, pulling both Albedo and Kolmolthan's complete attention.</p><p>     The white-haired demon wanted to offer some sort of support or comfort or something, but frankly, she wasn't sure what she could possibly say that would make her feel better when she was sober. Right now, she wasn't even sure how to start a sentence. She finished her last drink and slowly slid off of her stool, wobbling a little, nearly tipping over before she managed to grab the stool to steady herself. </p><p>     "Nevermind, we don't need music to dance, we can just dance you know, come on Albedo, help me pry Shalltear off the bar!" she exclaimed, grabbing one of Shalltear's arms.</p><p>     Together, the two guardians managed to pull the shorter guardian into a semi-standing position. Then, they both got in position for a waltz, sticking Shalltear between the two of them. With one arm wrapped around Albedo's waist, Kolmolthan rested her head on Shalltear's, her other hand was firmly in Albedo's, holding one of Shalltear's hands between them. Albedo wrapped her free arm around the two guardians. Although she would be hesitant to admit it, Albedo could be soft with the other guardians, of course it helped that she was incredibly inebriated. Nevertheless, there would come a day when she would have to show that she was the superior woman in the halls of Nazarick and that it would be her who would reign triumphant in taking Lord Ainz's hand in marriage, but for now, she could dance with them. </p><p>     The three quietly swayed back and forth, Shalltear cried into Kolmolthan's shoulder, occasionally her sobs cutting through the quiet. Albedo hummed melodically, guiding the two shorter guardians to sway to the rhythm she hummed at. Kolmolthan sighed and closed her eyes. For a moment, things were peaceful and serene. Sure, from the outside, they looked sloppy, barely able to stand, often nearly dragging each other down, but they actually seemed content for a moment. But, like most things, it had to be short lived.</p><p>     The sound of Cocytus's throat clearing (and echoing in his heavy exoskeleton), quickly drew the attention of all three women, causing them to quick split and whirl around the face him, sending Shalltear toppling into Albedo, who shoved her upright. Before them stood Cocytus, who looked on at them with impeccable stoicism, and Demiurge, who planted his face in his hand. </p><p>     Shalltear grinned and threw her hands into the air, "Yay! Cocytus and Demiurge have come to drink with us! Now it's a party!"</p><p>     Albedo struck the vampire with her sharp elbow before planting a false smile on her face as she attempted to appear as sober as possible, "Guardians! How are ya?" she drew, incredibly unconvincing.</p><p>     "Just how much have the three of you had to drink?" Cocytus questioned, watching the three sway slightly.</p><p>     Kolmolthan cleared her throat in an attempt to shake he drunken haze, "Well, those two? A lot! Me? Absolutely none! Nope, I am completely and entirely sober!" she stated, giving a decisive nod at the end as if that was supposed to be more convincing.</p><p>     "Doubtful," Demiurge returned, realizing now that Albedo and Kolmolthan were probably not the best choice for the mission of helping Shalltear. If he had wanted to get to the bottom of Shalltear's turbulence, he probably should have checked on her himself.</p><p>     "You know Koko-" Shalltear started.</p><p>     "Koko?" Cocytus questioned, though he went ignored by the vampire.</p><p>     "I take it back, you were right on the money about Cocytus's tits!" she finished, giggling, falling into Albedo, who giggled with her.</p><p>     Kolmolthan whacked Shalltear's shoulder with the back of her hand, "Geesh! Shut the fuck up Shalltear! Don't make it harder to pretend I'm sober!" she shot back.  </p><p>     Cocytus sighed, "I suppose it is not unnatural for warriors to want to lose control every once in awhile."</p><p>     She gave an unconvincing fake laugh in response, "Exactly! Wow, good times, anyways, I'm going to take these two to go sober up, and then I'll go do something productive like read a book or go for a long walk or something!" she returned, tossing one of her long side bangs with her hand. Then, she grabbed Shalltear's wrist and motioned for Shalltear to take Albedo's wrist and started leading them towards the exit.</p><p>     Demiurge stopped her in her tracks by holding his arm over the exit, "For my sake, just exactly how do you plan to sober them up?" he questioned, glancing over each of the three, who were at varying degrees of wasted.</p><p>     Kolmolthan scratched her cheek with her free hand before shrugging and laughing, "I dunno, I just figured I'd dump them in a cold bath or something, I really hadn't thought that far ahead!"</p><p>     "One of you will definitely end up drowning-"</p><p>     "I hope it's Shalltear, with her gone there's no one stopping me from getting at Lord Ainz!" Albedo cheered, earning scoff from the vampire.</p><p>     "As I was saying, that's not really a great idea, it might be better if the three of you sleep it off instead."</p><p>     Shalltear puffed up her cheeks, "That's a lot less fun though! I wanted to see Kolmolthan naked so I could figure out who the sexiest guardian is!"</p><p>     Kolmolthan scoffed, "Really, you're going to tell me that with the amount of time I spent naked, you never saw me once? Also, what's your criteria? I mean, who all is in the running? I mean I'm cute and all, but I'm definitely not going to try and compete with Albedo or Demiurge if we're talking traditional beauty standards-"</p><p>     "Wait, are you saying I'm not traditionally sexy?" Shalltear returned, shaking Kolmolthan's grip on her wrist.</p><p>     "That's not exactly what I said, but I mean, you fit a more niche definition of sexy-"</p><p>     "Why! I ought to strike you down where you stand for your disrespect!"</p><p>     "Please," Demiurge interrupted, "as interesting as this debate is, I believe you three should retire for the evening."</p><p>     "Yes, you're right," Albedo replied, standing up straight and brushing her dress flat in a moment of clarity, "I should rest, so that I will be better able to serve Lord Ainz tomorrow," she explained. She gave a slight nod of her head, "Farewell," she offered, before teleporting away from the bar with the use of her Ring of Ainz Ooal Gown gifted to her for her dutiful serve to Nazarick.</p><p>     "Huh, I hope she actually made it to her room," Kolmolthan mumbled, he concern somewhat muddled by the slurring of her words.</p><p>     Demiurge pinched the bridge of his nose in exasperation, "I should have suspected this is how things would turn out when you agreed to check on Shalltear, but even still, I can't help but be a bit surprised."</p><p>     "Yes, it must be surprising that I've done such an incredible job cheering Shalltear up! All it took was a lot more alcohol! You have to drink so much alcohol that you go through the cycle of sad, so you drink, then happy, so you keep drinking, then sad because you drank too much, then all the way back to happy!" she explained as she swayed, despite the fact that she felt like she was standing completely still.</p><p>     He rubbed his temples as he tried to put together what logic she could possibly be operating off of before he eventually decided to give the credit to incredible drunkeness, "Right, well, you two should also head to bed."</p><p>     "That's a good idea," Kolmolthan agreed, looking vaguely tired, though it was rather difficult to tell as such conditions as tired, hungry, thirsty, etc. didn't typically affect demons, however, circumstances did apply, and drinking more than enough alcohol to put down a large human was certainly a circumstance.</p><p>     Demiurge sent a look to vermin-lord he stood with before sighing, "Cocytus, would it be a problem to escort Shalltear to her room?"</p><p>     He let out a puff of steam through his exoskeleton, "Not at all, it would be honor to ensure that Shalltear arrives safely at her room."</p><p>     Shalltear giggled, seemingly like she planned on saying something, but instead she was overwhelmed by fits of laughter as Cocytus gently nudged her from the bar, unfazed as she gingerly pointed at his thorax and continued her riotous giggling.</p><p>     "Well, if that takes care of that I'm going to go be productive and definitely not just collapse in bed and sleep for ten hours."</p><p>     Demiurge scoffed, "Can you collapse into bed if what you're collapsing into barely qualifies as a bed?"</p><p>     She rolled her eyes, nearly falling over in the direction she rolled them in as she did, "Listen, I'll sleep in a real bed at some point, but for now, my makeshift bed is more comfort than I've ever known and it's good enough."</p><p>     "Yes, I suspect that's true."</p><p>     "Alrighty! See ya later," she chimed, starting to head towards the door again, only to, yet again, be stopped by his outstretched arm. "Okay, this was fun the first time but this is really starting to get irritating so if you could just-"</p><p>     "Calm down, I was going to offer to teleport you to your room so you didn't have to walk."</p><p>     She pursed her lips and nodded, "Oh, yeah, that'd be nice. Thanks."</p><p>     He didn't intend to, but he hesitated a moment as he held out his arm for her to take. He couldn't help but be reminded by his earlier daydream. Despite the fact that he had pushed it aside, somehow he still found himself inadvertently playing house with her. He could try and rationalize it, but as her fingers curled around his bicep and the side of her head ghosted just above his sleeve, he couldn't help but have those thoughts of banal domesticity again. Even worse, he couldn't help but wonder if she had those same thoughts. </p><p>     However, now was not the time. It was shockingly easy to brush them away again as he remembered that right now his main concern was bringing her safely to her room and getting back to work. There was much to be done when it came to the security of Nazarick. Furthermore, he supposed that perhaps if he got his work done and completed a few extra tasks he was certain would aid Lord Ainz in the future, perhaps he could take some time to think about those ridiculous daydreams of his. So, it was probably best that he got her to her room sooner than later so as not to delay his work.</p><p>     In less than the time it would take to blink, they were standing in the hallway her room was in. He intended to walk her to her room in silence, but of course, Kolmolthan would never let that happen.</p><p>     "I don't think Shalltear is doing well."</p><p>     He let out a long sigh as he glanced down at her, though her head was turned down so he couldn't gauge her expression, "Yes, I suppose that much is obvious."</p><p>     She chuckled half-heartedly, "Easy now," though her chuckles quickly dwindled to nothing as she continued, "I'm just not sure there's really anything we can do to help her."</p><p>     Demiurge stopped in front of her door as he replied, "I believe you might be correct."</p><p>     "There's a first time for everything."</p><p>     The devil chuckled as she released his arm and reached for her door to stabilize her instead.</p><p>     "Thanks for bringing me to my room, if you ever need help getting to your room, just let me know," she offered, swaying a little as she slowly pushed her door open.</p><p>     "I'll keep that in mind," he concluded, turning slightly, but not fully, until after she closed the door behind her.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>okay, bye :|</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Convention</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hello! Welcome to chapter four! (please ignore the chapter label :))</p>
<p>CW: none<br/>TW: none</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>     She knocked somewhat absent-mindedly on the door to Lord Ainz's quarters, not because she was looking for the supreme being, but because she was looking for one particular demon who spends more than her fair share of time in his quarters.</p>
<p>     "Albedo?" she started, "It's Kolmolthan, are you in here?"</p>
<p>     She peeked into the room and, sure enough, she spotted the naked demon underneath the covers of his large four poster canopy bed. Someone more prudish might have a problem with it, but frankly she wasn't particularly concerned about what she was walking into and she essentially ignored the lustful panting of the succubus as she sat upright, carefully ensuring that the majority of the Lord Ainz body-pillow was tucked underneath the sheet.</p>
<p>     "I'm busy ensuring the Lord Ainz's bed is covered in my scent, what do you need cow?"</p>
<p>     Kolmolthan flicked her forked tongue at her before holding up a book bound in yellowing pale leather with titling and contents that she couldn't read, "Can you tell me what this book is about? Aura brought it back for me-"</p>
<p>     "Give it here," she acquiesced holding out one hand for the book while her other held her sheet over her chest.</p>
<p>     The demon's tail twitched slightly, probably less in irritation at being interrupted and more in excitement at the fact that she would finally know what one of her books was about. She handed the book over and watched as she skimmed over the title before flipping through the pages with what seemed like little interest.</p>
<p>     It was no secret that majority of the residents of Nazarick, including many of the guardians had little ability to read the script of the new world. Some of them had skills or items which gave them the ability, but most of them had no need to, including Kolmolthan. What would be the need? She spent all of her time patrolling the courtyard of Nazarick. She didn't have missions that took her away from the tomb for any period of time, and it wasn't like she specialized in intelligence gathering or anything. No, she had no need to read anything from this new world. However, she had enough books on her shelf that it was now a bookshelf and she couldn't tell what even one of them was about. </p>
<p>     Suddenly Albedo's eyes widened and she snapped the book shut.</p>
<p>     "So, what's it about?"</p>
<p>     "Can I borrow this?" Albedo asked with deadly seriousness.</p>
<p>     Kolmolthan was startled by her sudden coolness and straightened her stance just a little, "Uh, sure I guess, is it important or something?"</p>
<p>     Albedo gigged maniacally and hugged the book to her chest, her face bright red as she tucked her knees up to her chin.</p>
<p>     "Can you at least tell me what it's about though?"</p>
<p>     The succubus giggled darkly before gazing at the demon through her dark lashes, "It's a romance novel, and <em>very </em>steamy."</p>
<p>     She snorted before grinning, "Oh yeah? Huh, I guess I'll need to get you to read the good parts to me."</p>
<p>     Albedo turned up her chin at this suggestion and huffed, "As if! Why don't you just figure out how to read for yourself."</p>
<p>     "Oh yeah I'll get right on that, enjoy the book, don't get anything on it."</p>
<p>     She didn't dignify Kolmolthan's snide remark with a response and instead peeked back into the book, her pupils wide with excitement as she imagined that it was her and her love acting out the scenes depicted in the book rather than two pathetic unimportant humans. She wondered how long it would take to completely edit the whole text to instead use her and Lord Ainz's names and descriptions rather than "Thulio" and "Rhea". She supposed that she might be able to borrow Sebas when he returned from his mission in the capitol, but that seemed like that would be some time from now. She drummed her fingers on the pages as she considered which residents were capable of reading the languages of the new world and would be on her side on becoming Lord Ainz's wife.</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>     "I don't think I'm going to tell Aura what the book she found was about," Kolmolthan murmured as she stepped out of the Supreme One's quarters and stepped into the hallway. </p>
<p>     She couldn't help but wonder just what other sorts of books were sitting on her bookshelf. She let out a half sigh at the fact that she had loaned out a book before she had the chance to even hear the title. She supposed it made more sense that someone who could read it had it, but even still, it seemed a little cold to receive a gift from a fellow guardian and then immediately loan it to someone.</p>
<p>     However, she quickly shook these thoughts away and elected to head back to work. Like most of the guardians, when she didn't have specific orders, she'd simply spend the majority of her time patrolling her "floor" (jury's still out on rather the courtyard counts as a floor). It seemed like these days most of the guardians were busy with orders away from Nazarick, but she, Shalltear, Albedo, and the guardians normally expected to spend most of their time at Nazarick were not among those guardians. Sure, it made sense to her that the overseer, the one who runs the day-to-day operations of Nazarick, spent her time at the tomb, and Shalltear was still on a probation of sorts after her rebellion, but Kolmolthan felt she was perfectly capable of doing more for Nazarick.</p>
<p>     It's not that she didn't want to patrol the courtyard. She was happy to serve Lord Ainz and Nazarick however she could, but she wondered often as to rather this was to the best of her abilities. Sure, walking the grounds was fun. The weather was usually nice and the groundkeepers were all friendly, though she'd never get used to being called Lady Kolmolthan and frequently told them that there was no need to use titles with her, but it just seemed like she should be out conquering lands in the name of the Supreme One, Lord Ainz Ooal Gown, or assassinating traveling nobles to create unrest in the neighboring nations. However, since Shalltear was attacked and they discovered the existence of world items in the new world, she had only been given a handful of missions outside of Nazarick. </p>
<p>     As she reached the top stair of entrance of Nazarick she took in a deep breath of fresh air. Not that there wasn't the ever slightest hint of the scent of decay, but it was still a different scent from that of the interior of the tomb. She descended the stairs and was greeted by a couple of groundkeepers who were trimming the branches of one of the trees.</p>
<p>     "Good morning, Lady Kolmolthan," they chimed, pausing a moment to bow slightly. </p>
<p>     Kolmolthan gave a wave in return, "'Hoy, working hard or hardly working?"</p>
<p>     They giggled in response to her somewhat hackneyed saying. Not that it was hackneyed in the new world, in fact, in the new world it was clever and almost legitimately funny. It probably wasn't a surprise, but Kolmolthan was particularly well-liked by most of the servants of Nazarick. Not just because of her looks and personality, but also because she was a non-guardian who rose to the position of guardian when the need arose. It's not that they disliked their roles in Nazarick, far from it. It was the greatest honor to be allowed to serve Lord Ainz and Nazarick, but her rising above her station to become a guardian was certainly admirable.</p>
<p>     Not that Kolmolthan was aware of this. She just figured being a generally friendly and charismatic person was why most of the residents of Nazarick (aside from those who were specifically made to dislike her or others in general) seemed to view her in a positive light.</p>
<p>     There were rarely any undead up and about after Demiurge made some strategic changes to the courtyard, and oddly Kolmolthan found herself missing them. Sure, they ripped up the flowers and grass and were rather on the messy side, but it was oddly lonely just hanging out in the courtyard mostly by herself. She wandered aimlessly around the grounds. The grass was neatly trimmed and the headstones near the main tomb were cleaned, and Kolmolthan couldn't help but feel that perhaps the gardeners and groundkeepers deserved some recognition for how neat they kept the outside of the tomb. It seemed like hard work, and not that many people spent that much time outside so it seemed likely to her that few had noticed just how nice the outside of Nazarick was. </p>
<p>     Of course, no place in the courtyard quite compared to the little flower garden Kolmolthan had requested. Most of the flowers were some shade of white or purple in all sorts of petal shapes, but there were also some red spikey flowers and blue flowers with petals that curled at the end. As per her request, all of them were considered to be varying degrees of poisonous to humans and would potentially be of use to Nazarick. As they gain more information about some of the flora native to the new world, the groundkeepers said that new flowers and plants would be added. However, even now Kolmolthan couldn't help but feel that the garden was quite lovely.</p>
<p>     She hoped that Lord Ainz had seen it and felt that her request was worthwhile. Not that she felt that the courtyard wasn't already lovely, but the new flowers only added to the majesty. She sat down on a bench that overlooked the flowers and admired them. Albedo herself had remarked that she wouldn't mind spending an afternoon in the garden with Lord Ainz. That seemed like high praise from Albedo as her time with Lord Ainz was perhaps one of the most important things to her. As lonely as it was in the courtyard, Kolmolthan couldn't help but agree that it'd be nice to spend some time in the garden with others.</p>
<p>     She stood from bench and continued her patrol of the courtyard. Everything was peaceful, as per usual. There was nothing that stood out to her as being out of the ordinary. Groundkeepers worked tirelessly to keep the great tomb in excellent shape and surely if any of them spotted something that seemed suspicious, they would let her know immediately. She could see the vestige of the magic Mare used to hide Nazarick from prying eyes. She didn't have the opportunity to talk to Mare much, but she admired his intellect and skills as a druid.</p>
<p>     Really, she admired all of her fellow guardians, some of them more than others, but all of them tended to weigh more on the positive side. She wondered if perhaps this was the echo of her creator in her. She was vaguely aware of the fact that the supreme beings imbued their creation not only with unique facets, but also with aspects of their own personalities. Unfortunately, unlike some of the other guardians, she had not had the opportunity to overhear conversations or gain insights into her own creator's relationships. Her time has a guardian had given her ample time to consider her own creation, and by extension, her creator. </p>
<p>     <em>Wish III</em>, according to her own knowledge, was one of the founding members of the guild the Supreme Being Ainz Ooal Gown now bore the name of, but that was essentially where it ended. He remained an illusive mystery. For all intents and purposes, she could list off far more information about Bukubukuchagama just from hanging out with Aura with some frequency. However, there were some things she supposed that she could gleam from her creator just based on her own mannerisms. According to Shalltear, she had once heard her own creator remark that Wish III wanted her to have a "rebelliously casual prince-like" personality, not that either of them could understand what that meant. She supposed that perhaps alluded to the idea that maybe her creator shared her pride and strength, as well as her friendly and agreeable disposition. The whole prince-like thing was little confusing, but she supposed that if the supreme beings seemed to have little qualms about breaking down clothing barriers, there was no reason that they could mold the pitiful human concepts of royal titles to better fit their higher ideals.</p>
<p>     However, he also tucked her away from everyone else, and seemed to have every intention of giving her away. What did that indicate about her creator? It had occurred to her that perhaps he never intended on giving her away and that the power of the supreme beings was as unrivaled as she believed it to be and that she was merely bait to encourage others to throw themselves down as offerings to them. This did seem somewhat likely, but then why tuck her away? Would it not have made more sense to station her to defend Nazarick? It felt wrong to even dare to question to actions of the supreme beings, but she, like the rest of the guardians, had faults. </p>
<p>     When she rounded back to the front of the main tomb, she admired the now completely trimmed tree. The leaves were sparse, but a dark green color that reflected the warm yellow light from the sun overhead. The expert work of the groundkeepers produced beautiful and healthy looking trees (not that Kolmolthan could tell a healthy tree from an unhealthy tree). She would admit, she did feel lucky to have the courtyard as her domain, even if it had not originally been intended for her.</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>     The sun had long since set over the horizon, and the stars now hung far above the sky. Aura had told her that it looked silly when adults reached up like they could try and grab the stars, but Kolmolthan couldn't help it. As she sat comfortably on the outer wall of Nazarick, she stretched out a hand towards the horizon, like the stars there were just before her eyes instead of unimaginably far away. She curled her fingers like she was grabbing those she blocked out with her hand before letting it fall loosely back into her hand. She poked at the flesh of her pointer finger boredly with her thumbnail. </p>
<p>     She turned to look over her shoulder as she sensed presences behind her, but was unsurprised to find it was merely Aura and Mare. One couldn't teleport directly into Nazarick, so everyone, even Lord Ainz himself, had to first teleport to the exterior. Of course, with a ring of Ainz Ooal Gown, one could teleport floor to floor from there. She gave a friendly wave to the two dark elves, greeting them as they headed towards the tomb.</p>
<p>     "Hey Kol! Working hard or hardly working!" Aura yelled, using the saying Kolmolthan had taught her, but as less of a question and more of a statement.</p>
<p>     Mare gave a timid wave, that likely would have been imperceptible for someone who didn't have improved eyesight, but reciprocated Kolmolthan's greeting nonetheless.</p>
<p>     "How goes the construction in the forest?" she called to them, turning around to face the elves so she didn't have to keep turning to speak to them.</p>
<p>     Aura nodded enthusiastically, "Really good! I think we'll be done soon so long as we don't have any problems!"</p>
<p>     "Good to hear! One of the members of the Pleiades should be just inside to return your ring to you Mare," she finished, returning her attention to surveying the courtyard.</p>
<p>     The residents of Nazarick who had received a ring of Ainz Ooal Gown had been instructed to leave their rings with an indicated member of the Pleiades whenever they left the tomb so as to prevent an outside force from obtaining a ring that would allow them easy access to much of the tomb. Kolmolthan didn't have to worry about this rule for several reasons. The first, of course, was that she rarely left the tomb, and the second was they she had not yet proved herself worthy of one. </p>
<p>     She shifted her weight back and placed her hands behind her to support herself. From this position, she could stretch out her legs comfortably and still look up at the stars. She couldn't help being so enamored by them. There was something so mystical and fantastic about them. There were plenty of things that were beyond her understanding, but the stars were especially curious to them. The light they gave off was minimal in comparison to the sun or the moon, but even still, their glow created a shell of faint white light around the perceivable expanse. It was curious how the sky could both produce such bright lights and also such dull ones. She supposed that Lord Ainz most know, as his knowledge and wisdom far surpassed that of any of the guardians, but she feared that it would be far beneath him to explain the sky to one of his lowly underlings. </p>
<p>     As she wondered if perhaps one of the other guardians had knowledge of how the sky operated, she again shifted her gaze to the area near the entrance of the tomb as she sensed another presence.</p>
<p>     "Cocytus! How goes the invasion plans?"</p>
<p>     "Hello Kolmolthan, I believe the invasion of the lizardmen will progress as expected. I have made strategic use of the forces supplied to me by the Supreme One and I believe in two days time we will be victorious," he returned, cold air quickly forming puffs of fog as he exhaled.</p>
<p>     "Wow, that sounds intense, but I'm sure you'll do great!" she chimed, leaning forward to make it easier to call out to the vermin-lord.</p>
<p>     Cocytus raised one of his armored appendages as if to wave her farewell, "Lord Ainz has entrusted our victory to me, I will not fail him."</p>
<p>     With that, she was again left to her own devices. This was a typical routine. Perhaps another reason she enjoyed patrolling the courtyard at night was that she got to greet her fellow guardians as they returned from their work outside of the tomb. Of course, all of them could technically work continuously due to equipment or racial skills that made it unnecessary to rest, but Lord Ainz seemed very particular about them not doing so. She had to assume that he must have a reason to do so, but really she wouldn't mind devoting all of her time to serving him if that is what he desired. However, she also felt that her time spent at leisure was also in service to him, since it was he that ordered them to rest. Either way, this order resulted in each of the guardians working away from Nazarick arriving outside of the tomb at various times of the night. </p>
<p>     It was nice to spend time with the other guardians. Sure, if ordered into complete solitude, she would happily comply, but really, she enjoyed being around her fellow residents of Nazarick. She considered most, if not all of them, her friends. Sure, Kyouhukou was a little <em>startling</em> and Albedo had assured her that Nigredo would strongly dislike her due to her general distaste for infants, but even still, she didn't particularly dislike them or anything. After all, it was how they were made, and it seemed doubtful that she could truly dislike them for the way that the supreme beings made them. It wasn't Kyouhukou's fault he and his family were bone chilling, no more so than it was Nigredo's fault that she loved babies more than anything else. </p>
<p>     Thankfully, however, the only people she encountered outside the tomb were those she had generally positive relationships with. Of course, she was good friends with Aura, both of them sticking out as the two female guardians who were considered to not be in the running to be Lord Ainz's wife. Kolmolthan wasn't entirely sure why it had become a two horse race between Albedo and Shalltear, but she was happy enough to fall in line and put her bets on Albedo. Either way, she considered her relationship with Mare also to be a positive one, though she rarely had the opportunity to have a full conversation with him. She didn't consider herself particularly fond of children, but Aura and Mare were certainly the exception. </p>
<p>     Cocytus could be hard to understand at times. She supposed that they should have some kinship since both of them tended to focus less on magical attacks and more on physical attacks, but their personalities weren't exactly harmonious. Whereas Kolmolthan generally considered herself an eccentric and talkative person with a generally curious nature, Cocytus tended to be more rigid and firm, taking hard stances based solely on principle. Of course, she didn't fault him for that by any means, and she was certain there were more layers to him that she just hadn't seen based on the fact they didn't interact much. She supposed that she should probably put forward more of an effort to spend some time and get to know the guardians that she hadn't spent a lot of time with yet.</p>
<p>     Shalltear and Albedo didn't often leave Nazarick so she didn't see them returning to the tomb at night, but Kolmolthan considered herself to have a good relationship with both of them and she couldn't prevent them from crossing her mind. Even still, she couldn't help but feel that both of them held her at an arms length in sort of a "keep your friends close and your enemies closer" sort of deal, though rivals was probably a more apt description. She supposed that even though both of them vocally claimed that she was not a threat to them when it came to the competition to become Lord Ainz's true wife, that was more or less an attempt to not-so subtly convince others that she was not a threat. Of course, there was the very real possibility that she wasn't Lord Ainz's type, and based on the attention he gave to the women with more traditional appearances, she was inclined to agree. Regardless, she considered both of them to be friends, even if they occasionally treated her as a threat. Plus, it didn't hurt that both of them were attractive. She didn't have any reason to diss Cocytus, but if she had to choose between looking at him or Albedo for an extended period of time, she'd probably pick Albedo.</p>
<p>     "I thought you were going to be away until after the conquest of the lizardmen," she stated, removing herself from her thoughts to gaze down at the other demonic presence in the courtyard.</p>
<p>     "Yes, I had intended to be, but my work has progressed somewhat quicker than I anticipated, I've returned to deliver results to Lord Ainz in person."</p>
<p>     "Ah, well, I believe Lord Ainz is back in E-Rantel," she returned, shifting to stand to her feet.</p>
<p>     Before she could hop down to join the devil on equal ground, she was stopped by the sight of wings sprouting from his back. She couldn't help but be envious of those who had the ability to fly. She couldn't cast the fly spell without a scroll, and none of her forms were capable of flight. Sure, she was unmatched when it came to a standing leap without the use of magic or transformations, but the fact that Demiurge could so effortlessly just sprout wings and join her on the walls of Nazarick gave Kolmolthan the feeling that she was missing out. Her tail flicked ever so slightly with irritation, which did not go unnoticed by the other guardian.</p>
<p>     "I find it hard to believe that you despise my presence, so I'm forced to ask, is everything alright?" he pressed, shifting his weight slightly as he eyed the demon closely.</p>
<p>     She scratched her scalp near her right horn uneasily as she mulled over her next words. It seemed a little embarrassing to admit that she was jealous of those who could fly, but she supposed it was only natural, right? Surely he was jealous of her horns right? After she thought that, she couldn't help but feel a bit of pre-emptive embarrassment.</p>
<p>     She opted for the truth, "It's kind of ridiculous, but I wish I could fly."</p>
<p>     Kolmolthan felt a familiar burning in her face as she avoided attempting to gauge his reaction and instead opted to stare past him at the spot where the treetops cut off the night sky. She heard a hollow chuckle emanate from his direction and she blew out a puff of air, prepared to shoot back with something snarky, but she stopped herself as his wings vanished. She elected to return to her sitting position on the edge of the wall and simply motion for him to join her.</p>
<p>     "None of my forms really add anything or take anything away, does it feel weird when you have or don't have wings? Like, do you miss them?" she questioned as he sat down next to her.</p>
<p>     He seemed to think this over for a moment before shrugging slightly, "I suppose I don't really think about them much since the majority of the time is spent in a form that doesn't typically have wings."</p>
<p>     Kolmolthan gave a half of a laugh before turning her head slightly shoot him a glance, "I guess that makes sense."</p>
<p>     "None of your other forms really add anything?" Demiurge queried, drumming his fingers lightly on the side of his thigh as he thought this statement of hers over.</p>
<p>     "Huh? Well, not really anyway, I mean I guess some fur, but that's really the only major change. I would've thought you would have learned all about my various skills and abilities during this time," she observed at the end, a bit curious as to just how much he knew about her skillset.</p>
<p>     "Of course I have, it was imperative that I did so I could best plan for the security of Nazarick, a job I don't take lightly, but I haven't observed much of your power with my own eyes, it's simply what knowledge Lord Ainz compiled for me," he explained.</p>
<p>     "Oh," she started, pausing to think about the validity of the fact before continuing, "I have a form that's essentially a large cow with long fur, the only time I really think about it is when it's cold, and I figure it'd be nice to have a couple of layers of fur."</p>
<p>     "Ah yes, speaking of, Cocytus recently mentioned that he was confused by the fact that you're known as 'Kolmolthan, the Bull', when bulls are typically considered males of a species, of course we came to the conclusion that the supreme beings had little need for the traditional usage of dimorphic descriptors, but I figured I'd ask if you had any insights into why bull instead of cow."</p>
<p>     She gave a melodic laugh, which tugged at the smile on Demiurge's face before she spoke, "I think you both were spot on, and really I think it all comes down to aesthetic. Kolmolthan, the Bull has a lot more impact than Kolmolthan, the Cow, but I do think demonic cow is a valid description of me, if not a bit crude."</p>
<p>     "Kolmolthan, the Bull does strike a certain feeling into the hearts of those who hear it," he agreed, meeting her gaze.</p>
<p>     "Is it burning desire?" she queried, a mirthful smile curved over her lips.</p>
<p>     He gave a hum of amusement, "That's not exactly how I'd describe it."</p>
<p>     "Don't let me stop you, how would you describe it?"</p>
<p>     Demiurge eyed her for a moment before letting his eyes slide closed in thought, "So, I've been away so long you've started fishing for compliments?" he finally offered as he opened his eyes again.</p>
<p>    She snorted slightly as his slight dig at her before holding her hands up as if to say she surrenders.</p>
<p>    "Say, Demiurge, you are capable of reading any of the scripts from the new world, right?" she changed the subject, thinking about the row of mysterious books that weighed heavily on her mind.</p>
<p>     "Ah yes, I wondered when you would finally decide to ask for some help concerning your collection. And to answer your question, yes, I possess the necessary skills to do so."</p>
<p>     "Well, I finally decided to ask Albedo, but as soon as she read a little bit of it she asked to borrow it, I figured you probably would be less interested in borrowing them since I doubt any of them will be useful to your work."</p>
<p>     Demiurge adjusted his glasses with the tip of his middle finger as he considered this before giving a slight nod, "I see, was the book useful to Albedo's work?"</p>
<p>     Kolmolthan paused a moment, she seemed slightly troubled as she thought over this question, "... I'm not entirely sure how to answer that."</p>
<p>     His eyebrows knitted together for just a moment as he watched her decide rather the book Albedo' borrowed could be of use to her service to Nazarick. He wasn't entirely sure how the answer could be more nuanced than yes or no, though he decided it wouldn't help him much to deride her simply because she felt that the answer did require more in-depth analysis.</p>
<p>     "I suppose the book could potentially aid her in the production of an heir, but I have to imagine that it would be beneath both Albedo and Lord Ainz to make use of whatever drivel humans could possibly care to imagine," she explained, only adding to the devil's confusion.</p>
<p>     He quirked an eyebrow, "Just what kind of book was it?"</p>
<p>     "According to Albedo, romance, and beyond suggestive."</p>
<p>     "Ah, yes, that makes sense," he murmured, supposing that was the most obvious answer.</p>
<p>     She scratched the back of her neck before giving an uneasy laugh, "Though, I don't know for sure, and she didn't seem inclined to read any of it to me. Of course, it's not like I really care what humans have to say about love, sex, loyalty, etc., I mean, they're humans, but even still, I can't help also having some odd fascination."</p>
<p>     "I can't fault you for that, and I know you said you figured I'd be less likely to want to borrow your books, but if you don't mind, I'd like to borrow it next after Albedo."</p>
<p>     Kolmolthan gave a soft grunt in response before sighing, "Yeah, I guess so, it's not like I'll get much use of it anyway," she laughed, tugging at the large jewelry in her ears to occupy her hands.</p>
<p>     "Barring we both have the time, I'd be more than happy to read it to you, in fact, it might be worth broaching the idea of a book reading as entertainment for Lord Ainz. He has expressed some disappointment at the lack of suitable entertainment at Nazarick, perhaps this could be one," he explained, sinking deeper and deeper into his own thoughts as he considered how best to rectify this shortcoming.</p>
<p>     "Huh, that is true, though do you suppose that a trashy romance novel could entertain the Supreme One?" she questioned, seemingly not-so convinced.</p>
<p>     "I suppose I'll have to inquire as to what his preferred genre is, and compare his answer to your collection, yes, this just might work," he continued before promptly standing.</p>
<p>     Kolmolthan looked up at him as he held out a hand to help her up. This was simply a gesture of kindness more than anything. It's not like she was incapable of getting up on her own, it was just that he was a gentleman, and Kolmolthan was happy to accept. She placed her hand in his gloved one, both curling their fingers as she stood and he gave an ever slight tug to give her some momentum.</p>
<p>     "I assume you want to peruse?"</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>     Kolmolthan sat comfortably on her bed, her shoes sat off to the side as she had no interest in tracking dirt onto it. Demiurge, on the other hand, ran his gloved fingers over the spines of the books on her shelf.</p>
<p>     "I see you've added to your collection," he observed, noticing that the shelf now contained solely books, and there was space for perhaps only one or two more.</p>
<p>     "Yeah, I've found a couple and Aura brought me the one Albedo currently has," she sat in thought for a moment before adding, mostly for herself, "I guess I should probably get something for Aura."</p>
<p>     The devil plucked one from the shelf and flipped it open, skimming the pages briefly before glancing over the pages at the demon boredly picking at the fraying on her bed.</p>
<p>     "I have to admit, I'm surprised that you haven't upgraded your sleeping arrangements, I'm sure one of the maids could find you some more proper bedding..." he trailed off.</p>
<p>     He didn't often use his room, probably less than Kolmolthan did, but even still, he had an actual bed. Her bed didn't look incredibly comfortable, but as he looked at her sitting casually cross-legged on the floor, he supposed that she must be at least somewhat comfortable. Though, the longer he stared, the more he found his thoughts drifting from the supposed comfort of her bed to admiring the smoothness of her alabaster skin. He wondered for just a moment what it would feel like to drag his fingers over her skin, and then if she had the same thoughts about him. Though, he quickly pushed those aside, mostly because he was fairly confident that the answer to the second question was most certainly.</p>
<p>     She spoke as he returned his attention to the book in his hands, "You're probably right, but you know, it's really not that uncomfortable. In fact, I'm not even sure I even need to get another bed."</p>
<p>     He eyed her suspiciously, considering perhaps that essentially sleeping on hard tiled floor actually was comfortable. Then, he snapped the book shut and placed it back on the shelf before scanning the titles and retrieving another one.</p>
<p>     "What was the one you just put back about?"</p>
<p>     "I believe a collection of some rather lackluster poetry, not exactly inspired."</p>
<p>     Kolmolthan seemed somewhat nonplussed by this vague answer and looked up at him expectantly with mock doe-eyes, but he expertly avoided this skillful attack by simply burying his nose in the book in his hands. She reclined back on her bed in defeat, folding her arms behind her head as she tossed one of her legs over the other. </p>
<p>     "What's that one about?"</p>
<p>     His lips curved up devilishly as he glanced over the top of the book, "I believe there's a chance that the book Albedo borrowed may be a part of a series."</p>
<p>     This caught her attention, "Wait, really?" she sat up expectantly.</p>
<p>     "<em>'Rhea slid her hand down Thulio's cheek. All she wanted was to rip his clothes off his body and provide him the sweet relief he craved, but she knew that it would be that much better if she dragged it out torturously slow.'</em>"</p>
<p>"And then?" she leaned forward, waiting for him to continue reading.</p>
<p>     "Are you expecting me to read the whole thing to you right now? I thought you weren't interested in what humans had to say about sex," he recounted, not even remotely surprised by her enthusiasm.</p>
<p>     She shrugged, "I take it back, I want to know all about what humans have to say about sex!"</p>
<p>     Demiurge couldn't help but take some amusement in this, but frankly he agreed, as he flipped the pages he was somewhat curious to see just what humans fantasized about.</p>
<p>     "I hope Rhea bites it," she huffed before returning to reclining, figuring that she'd have to wait until a potential book reading to learn rather she did or didn't.</p>
<p>     He winced ever so slightly at that thought before sighing, "Then I suppose you'll be sorely disappointed."</p>
<p>     She watched as he shut the book and tucked it under his arm before pausing to eye the reclined demon, "May I borrow this?" he queried, holding the closed book up.</p>
<p>     "Sure, just don't get anything on it," she replied, giving him the same instructions as Albedo.</p>
<p>     He sent her a look as if to say the warning was unnecessary before returning his attention to the other books on the shelves. Unlike Albedo, he was more or less borrowing the book simply for research purposes. What else could he possibly hope to get out of a book starring humans? Humans were barely good enough to be test subjects, anything else and they were burdensome. Books starring them could barely be considered literature.</p>
<p>     He skimmed through the rest of them. There was another book of poetry, a couple of fictional stories, possibly legends from the surrounding areas, and a book that appeared to be anthological short stories. None of them were particularly compelling, but he'd certainly keep them in mind. </p>
<p>     Kolmolthan watched as he picked up a book, examined the cover, than flipped through the pages before eventually replacing it and repeating this process over and over until he had exhausted all of the books on the shelf. She didn't ask him what all of them were about, though if he paused for a moment she would ask what it was about. The answers were simultaneously incredibly fascinating and also incredibly dull. She wanted to be able to read the books for herself, though she got the feeling that if she could she would instantly lose interest in them. It was a paradox of sorts. When he replaced the last book, he turned to face her, piquing her interest. She pushed herself to sit upright and watched as he adjusted the book tucked underneath his arm,</p>
<p>    "I believe I'll be taking my leave."</p>
<p>    "Cool, enjoy the book," she replied, rising to her feet and tugging her shoes back on.</p>
<p>    "Are you going somewhere?" he questioned walking not too far behind her as she opened the door for him.</p>
<p>    She followed him out and closed the door behind her, standing in front of it as he turned to face her, "Well, it's not like there's much for me to do here, I figured I'd take a bath, write a report, and then spend a little bit of time patrolling the courtyard."</p>
<p>    "I see, then I'll bid you farewell. Enjoy your bath."</p>
<p>    "Will do, I'll probably see you after the lizardmen bodies are brought to Nazarick right?"</p>
<p>    He gave a small knowing smile, likely because that's not exactly how he anticipated the events of the conquest of the lizardmen proceeding, but he kept this to himself as he replied, "Yes, I'll see you then."</p>
<p>    With that, he vanished from the spot, leaving Kolmolthan to head towards the baths with nothing but the quiet of the evening to keep her company. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>okay. cool. I guess? :|</p>
<p>k. bye. :|</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Intermission</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Howdy! It's a fun little intermission! Yes, who doesn't love a short little intermission! It's essentially two little separate drabbles that are slightly more Sorcerer King Ainz Ooal Gown focused. I've given up my anger against ao3 for not allowing me to have prologues and having all of my chapters be numbered incorrectly. What even are numbers? Completely abstract. They have no real meaning. The same as letters, completely meaningless without the meaning we ascribe to them. So, you will no longer have to worry about angry ramblings. From now on, look forward to peaceful ramblings. Thank you.</p><p>TW: none<br/>CW: you know the episode/chapter where they're looking at the lizardmen village on the mirror of remote viewing?</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>     "Gate."</p><p>     She was the second to last guardian through the gate Lord Ainz opened. Frankly, she was more than happy to leave the lizardmen behind. It wasn't necessarily that she disliked them for any reason. Actually, she thought the lizardmen were rather charming. It was more so that she wasn't sure she could handle watching Demiurge use command mantra much more. Obviously it didn't affect her since she was far above the threshold one would need to be to bend to his will with a mere word, but the way he gave orders was more than thrilling, and she was certain any longer and she would have thrown herself at his feet and begged for him the moment they had even a semblance of privacy. She gave a flirty wave to the lizardmen still kneeling before the stone platform thrown by Gargantua as she started through the gate.</p><p>     "Ciao," she chimed, stepping through into the wooden construction Aura and Mare had been dutifully constructing as per the Supreme One's orders. </p><p>     The last guardian came through the gate after her and soon all of them were standing before their master, who held up a hand so as to indicate the bowing was not necessary. Victim left shortly after, returning to his duties at Nazarick.</p><p>     As Aura described the nature of the construction, Kolmolthan looked around, taking it in. Frankly, it was certainly better than she could have done. All-in-all, it was really well made, and the dark wood gave it a somewhat cozy feel to it. However, her attention was quickly drawn to certain fixture in the room as Lord Ainz questioned its purpose.</p><p>    "Plain though it may be, it seemed only right to prepare a throne for you," Demiurge explained, referencing a chair made entirely of various bones.</p><p>    Kolmolthan leaned slightly to the side to get a better look at it. It was, all things considered, quite nice looking. Certainly it couldn't compare to his throne at Nazarick, but it was true that the Supreme One should have someplace to sit, even if it wasn't quite up to his standards. Of course, as always, Lord Ainz had a far superior idea. She watched placidly, though not uninterestedly, as he ordered Shalltear to her hands and knees before sitting upon her back. This caught Kolmolthan's attention.</p><p>    "Sorry Demiurge, the throne will go the waste for now," Lord Ainz explained, though he was quickly reassured by the devil that using a guardian as a throne was far superior to anything he could have ever thought of or created.</p><p>    "Lord Ainz, may I be excused from the room? I will only be a moment," Albedo questioned, her composure not faltering for even a moment. Though her gaze had been previously locked on the panting Shalltear, leaving few to question just what the source of her ire was.</p><p>     Loud screams and crashing came from the next room over where Albedo had disappeared into. Kolmolthan bit her lips between her teeth to suppress the laughter that threatened to escape her, as she had to assume that it would be uncouth to cackle at the overseer when the supreme being was in their presence. It wasn't that funny, but wasn't it just a little? Albedo returned as calmly as she had left, as if none of them had overheard her outburst, and of course, no one dared to mention it.</p><p>     "Ah yes, Aura," she started after announcing her return, "I'm afraid when I left, I accidentally bumped into the wall. It appears to have been damaged, could you fix it up for me, later? Sorry for the inconvenience," she finished.</p><p>     Kolmolthan continued to suppress the urge to laugh, folding her hands together firmly in front of her, as if to give herself anything to distract herself from the general hilarity of the situation. Between Shalltear audibly panting and moaning and Albedo doing her best to remain completely cool, Kolmolthan was practically begging for Lord Ainz to call them to order so that she could focus her attention on doing her best to serve him. She supposed that she could always think about how powerful Demiurge looked commanding the lizardmen to kneel before their master, but she decided that solving one uncouth behavior with another was probably less than desirable. </p><p>     However, this problem disappeared altogether as Lord Ainz spoke, drawing all of the guardians not already on their hands and knees (aka, everyone aside from Shalltear) to kneel, "Alright, down to business: do you think we effectively scared the hell out of them?"</p><p>     A thin smile curled over her lips as she replied, "Surely no one could leave an encounter with your glorious might unafraid, much less those who could be dashed from this world without even having raised a finger against you."</p><p>     "Very good," he continued after hearing what his guardians had to say, "Then I suppose we can call the first stage of Cocytus's demonstration a success. We've set the stage perfectly for him."</p><p>     This was certainly true. It seemed clear to everyone in the room that the lizardmen would be more than willing to bow their heads before might of Lord Ainz, especially after Cocytus crushed whatever spirit they had left by destroying whatever forces they elected to bring before him.</p><p>     "Now, why don't we see how the lizardmen are spending their time?" he announced, pulling up the mirror of remote viewing, drawing the full attention of all the guardians in the room.</p><p>     Lord Ainz was correct, they were wasting their time fixing weapons and preparing for a fight like the actually had a chance. How could they possibly think even their full force compared to even a fraction of Cocytus's power? Kolmolthan was certain that if she had to go head-to-head, one-on-one with Cocytus in a battle of strength alone, she'd get utterly annihilated. To think that the lizardmen weren't simply spending these hours groveling before Lord Ainz seemed ridiculous, but of course, she couldn't entirely fault them doing their best since it guaranteed a better display to entertain their master.</p><p>     After he remarked that he didn't see two of the lizardmen chiefs, Aura recounted the name of the one with the magic weapon, "He said his name was Zaryusu, right?"</p><p>     "Ah, yes, I believe you're right."</p><p>     "Maybe he's inside one of the houses."</p><p>     "It's quite possible," Lord Ainz agreed before removing a scroll from a brown satchel, "The mirror of remote viewing can't offer a view indoors, at least, not normally. However, using magic, I can create a sensory organ. Then, by linking the too we should be able to..."</p><p>     He suddenly trailed off as everyone was given a view of the two lizardmen in question. Of course, this certainly was not what anyone had expected. It seemed to take a moment to register just what exactly they were all looking at, but as soon as they did, and Lord Ainz wiped the image from the screen, the room devolved into chaos.</p><p>     Kolmolthan had suppressed quite a bit of laughter, as such, she assumed that her tolerance had gone up and there were few things that could make her break. She certainly didn't think suddenly seeing two lizardmen going at it would be what did it, but really how could she not? Her shoulders shook as she laughed, listening to the riotous complaints of the other guardians, who found their actions more than distasteful.</p><p>     "I can't abide these lizardmen-"</p><p>     "Were they wrestling? I don't get it-"</p><p>     "-Disgusting creatures. I just might wipe them out."</p><p>     "Repulsive! They should be punished-"</p><p>     "-Why are we so angry?"</p><p>     Kolmolthan gave a sigh in an attempt to quiet her laughter and she watched her fellow guardians continued to express their disgust at the lizardmen.</p><p>     "-For subjecting us to such a display!"</p><p>     "Wait, were they..?"</p><p>     "Totally gross! No one wants to see that!"</p><p>     "Oh. <em>Oh. </em>Wow."</p><p>     "One of these days..."</p><p>     Finally, Lord Ainz held up a hand, drawing the full attention of the guardians, silencing their outbursts.</p><p>     "Well, they are about to die. In these situations the instinct to preserve the species kicks in, if movies are to be believed at least," Lord Ainz explained, seeking to soothe his outraged and disgusted guardians who seemed more than willing to abandon the plan to spare and rule over the lizardmen just for that display alone.</p><p>     However, that was a reasonable enough explanation in the minds of the guardians who seemed more than willing to accept their lord's explanation as to why the lizardmen had decided to waste their time in such a way. Quickly, the guardians expressed their firm agreement with this explanation, again stirring up various degrees of chaos in the room.</p><p>     "Yes, it's only natural."</p><p>     "This much can be forgiven."</p><p>     "There are much worse ways they could be spending their time," Kolmolthan purred, as if this moment needed anymore suggestive content.</p><p>     "Right? Totally fine! Leave it to Lord Ainz to know what's up!"</p><p>     "Oh, I see."</p><p>     "I have an urge to make a new species"</p><p>     "All of you quiet," Lord Ainz interrupted, pulling all of the guardians away from their attempt to rationalize what they saw. </p><p>     However, they were unaware of Lord Ainz's inner turmoil as he considered which adult guardian would be most fit hold a sex ed course for Aura and Mare. He scanned over each of them. Albedo was an obvious no. He supposed that Demiurge could provide the science side of it. He worried that Kolmolthan might feed them false information, but at least she'd do so in an age appropriate way. Though, he was most surprised by the thought that Shalltear actually probably wouldn't be an awful choice. In the end, he decided he'd cross that bridge when he got to it.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>     Lord Ainz turned his attention to the woman beside him, "Albedo, as guardian overseer, do you have any complaints about Kolmolthan's work?"</p><p>     Albedo shook her head, "No, Kolmolthan is a model guardian."</p><p>     He seemed a tad irritated by this short answer and cleared his throat (not that he had one), "Do you have any specific examples?"</p><p>     "She dutifully guards the courtyard, preforms any tasks asked of her with haste and efficiency, and gets along well with the other guardians and residents of Nazarick."</p><p>     He nodded and sighed, "That's a relief."</p><p>     "Lord?" she questioned, as if surprised by his change in demeanor.</p><p>     "I'll admit, I was worried some of the other guardians might not take well to adding one to their ranks and I wasn't sure rather Kolmolthan would take well to being in such an unfamiliar position," he elaborated, considering his original thought process behind changing an NPCs role. </p><p>     "Worry not my Lord, Kolmolthan gets along well with the other guardians. Aura especially seems to enjoy hanging out with her and Demiurge seems particularly fond of her."</p><p>     He drummed his skeletal fingers on the desk for a moment before shifting his gaze back to the succubus, "Fond?"</p><p>     "Yes, Demiurge shows a certain kindness to all of the denizens of Nazarick, but he seems to pay extra attention to Kolmolthan," she drew, as if entertained by the interpersonal relationships of the guardians under her purview.</p><p>     "I see, I'd like updates if their relationship progresses any. I'm not particularly troubled that neither of them mentioned this, but even still I'd like to be informed if anything changes."</p><p>     "Yes Lord, I'm sure they just didn't see any reason to trouble you with something so insignificant."</p><p>     Lord Ainz didn't want to admit it, but he was practically giddy. He couldn't have imagined that Kolmolthan, a guardian who wasn't even made to be a guardian was forming such strong bonds with the other NPCs. Plus, the idea that two NPCs could form unique bonds further proved that they had room for growth not only in their skills and abilities, but also personalities, interests, etc.. Of course, there was also a moment of panic that crossed over him as he supposed that if they could grow "fond" of one another, surely they could also lose fondness, perhaps in him. However, he couldn't help but be excited as he wondered what it was that was drawing them together. So far as he knew, none of it was written in either of their character backstories, but he supposed there was a possibility that both of them had been given "a type" and that both of them met each other's criteria to be each other's types.</p><p>     "Do you know if they've-" he started, unable to satiate his curiosity before Albedo cut him off.</p><p>     "So far as I know, neither one has made a significant move. However, Kolmolthan has expressed her interest with little subtly, so my guess is that Demiurge is putting off any further progression."</p><p>     If he had eyebrows, he probably would have scrunched them as he focused his gaze on his hands that rested with unusual stillness. He supposed it made a little sense. Demiurge was probably unsure of what his stance would be on relationships between guardians. He wondered if he should try and hint that he approves. Although, he had to take a moment to decide for himself rather he did indeed approve. Obviously both of them would put the good of Nazarick above all else, but if they were indeed so capable of growth and change, would this always be the case? He caught himself before he had the chance to wonder if demons and devils were even capable of feeling anything other than joy at the suffering of others and quickly replaced that thought with curiosity about how he could causally give hints to Demiurge.</p><p>     He didn't want the hints to be too obvious that he encouraged a conversation, a conversation that he figured would be incredibly awkward (for him, the demonic NPCs in this place seemed to have absolutely zero shame), and he also didn't want to be too obscure or he worried the devil would make a completely different conclusion and do something completely batshit. No, he needed to be clever about this. Clever was probably the wrong word. He couldn't try to be clever because if he tried that, Demiurge would undoubtedly somehow be a couple of steps ahead of him and somehow convince him to make some elaborate plan to do something or other. The more he thought about it, the more he wondered if Kolmolthan actually had any interest in the devil, or if Albedo was misreading completely innocuous interactions, because nothing about this train of thought made him feel like Kolmolthan could possibly be attracted to him.</p><p>     Though, Kolmolthan was odd in her own right. The more he thought about it, the more he could see it. Both of them were strong and he supposed they were attractive, not exactly in the same way, but attractive nonetheless. Plus, there was that trope of mild-mannered salarymen being into scary goth chicks. So, there was maybe some precedent for it. Still, it was hard to imagine the two of them just casually holding hands strolling down the hallways of Nazarick. He considered asking Albedo what would be a cute date idea for some vicious demons, but he got the feeling if he did that she'd get the wrong idea.</p><p>     It suddenly occurred to him that he hadn't even put this much thought into his own relationships when he was a human. Of course, it's not like he had any relationships, but if he did, he was still pretty sure he wouldn't have thought about it this much. No, he was certain that he wouldn't have thought about it like he was about the potential relationship between two of his guardians.</p><p>     "Right, that's all Albedo, thank you."</p><p>     "Of course, my Lord."</p><p>     He paused a moment before he broached, "Albedo, are there any other... <em>personal relationships </em>of the other guardians I should know about?"</p><p>     "Not that I am aware of Lord, but I'll make some inquiries to see if I've perhaps missed anything," she replied, her typical calmness evident in her voice.</p><p>     "Right, thank you Albedo."</p><p>     "Of course, my Lord."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>We love an intermission.</p><p>okay :|</p><p>goodbye? idk...</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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